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Is Your Relationship on Life Support?

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Is Your Relationship on Life Support?
If you are ready to improve your relationship, here are two must-do assignments to tackle now!
  • “Why can’t you program the DVR?”
  • “Why can’t you cook a decent meal without messing something up?”
  • “Why can’t you keep track of your things so you can find your stuff without a crisis?”
  • ”Why can’t you figure out how to balance a checkbook? It’s not brain surgery.”

Yes, it’s easy to get impatient with others for their failures. But know that what seems easy to you is actually a practiced skill, a strength, maybe even a talent. If that weren’t true, you’d be more empathetic with your criticism, responding with something such as:

  • “Yup, it’s so hard to keep up with the new technology.”
  • “I’ve got my own kitchen disaster tales I can share with you.”
  • “We’ve all got so much stuff; it’s tough to keep track of it all.”
  • “Balancing a checkbook is easier online once you get the hang of it.”

Next time you find yourself losing your patience with your loved one, instead of laying on the criticism, compliment yourself on what you do well. And know that not everyone can do what you do or know what you know, even when it seems oh-so-simple.

More from YourTango: 5 Rituals to Strengthen Your Marriage

 

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Article contributed by
Advanced Member

John M. Grohol

Psychologist

Dr. John Grohol is a mental health expert and founder of Psych Central. He has been writing about online behavior, mental health and psychology issues, and the intersection of technology and psychology since 1992.

Location: Newburyport, MA
Credentials: PsyD
Other Articles/News by John M. Grohol:

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I’m a big believer in the power of ritual. When you do something over and over, you start to anticipate the feelings you’ll have. So when it comes to our relationships, it’s important to have rituals that make us feel emotionally connected. Perhaps even more importantly, they create the expectation of being emotionally connected, which is half ... Read more

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