They're Called "Blind" Dates for a Reason

By

They're Called "Blind" Dates for a Reason
Think you've had a tough blind date? Read this Psych Central article and see if yours tops this one!

Honest to god: Deep into your 50s, can you not have the grace and courtesy to say, “I’m sorry you wasted 500 of your precious anytime minutes on me before we met, but I can’t do this”? I’m an adult. I can handle it, now, anyway. There was in fact a time when having something like this happen to me would have sent me into a month-long depressive spiral. With a tremendous amount of therapy and hard work (OK, and probably the medication and the ECT), I’m able to shake my head, chuckle bemusedly, and call your sorry butt out in a blog post that a few million people will see.

You, sir, were divorced after 19 years and haven’t had a relationship in almost 10 for a reason. If you are that emotionally arrested, you need a therapist, not me. I can pass along some names of good ones for ya.

 

As for me, I’m not discouraged from trying again — especially if I get more great stories like this out of it. I love that I’m learning (after many, many, many years and much resistance) to look at a situation from more than simply the negative side, and not necessarily to look at that one first. I love that I am becoming able to look in the mirror and think I’m kind of cute, for the first time ever, than stand there and think what a dog I am and how much I hate myself for it. I love being able to place blame where it belongs, instead of taking it all on myself no matter what. I love finally having learned how to reframe bad events to turn them into at least OK ones.

Bring on the frogs.

 

This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission.
Article contributed by
Advanced Member

John M. Grohol

Psychologist

Dr. John Grohol is a mental health expert and founder of Psych Central. He has been writing about online behavior, mental health and psychology issues, and the intersection of technology and psychology since 1992.

Location: Newburyport, MA
Credentials: PsyD
Website: PsychCentral
Other Articles/News by John M. Grohol:

Why Do Your Relationships Fail?

By

Have you had multiple partners, but the basic dynamic between you and them remains the same; which in short is this—you don't get what you want? Somehow you keep making the same mistake, either choosing the wrong person or looking for the wrong thing from the person you choose. Filling a void What I often see in my private practice are adults ... Read more

How To Love And Support Your Partner After Serving Overseas

By

What people do not see and may not understand is that the homecoming of a veteran is both a treasured event and a complex process. For a couple, in addition to all that it demands in terms of the reality of time, space, roles, money, kids and deployment cycles, homecoming means finding a way to integrate all that has happened to each partner into the ... Read more

Is Marriage A Good Deal Or An Ordeal?

By

There are lots of expectations about what marriage will provide that motivate people to choose it over the single life. Including … Love Companionship Regular sex Meaningful emotional connection Mutual support Financial and emotional security Material comfort A permanent ... Read more

See More

 
Latest Expert Videos
ASK YOURTANGO MORE QUESTIONS
Must-see Videos
SEE MORE VIDEOS
Most Popular