Hot or Not? Physical Attractiveness and Dating Choices

By

Hot or Not?  Physical Attractiveness and Dating Choices
Wondering about physical attractiveness and dating choices? Learn more in this article by Dr Grohol

Do less attractive people think the people they date (who also tend to be less attractive) delude themselves into thinking their dates are more physically attractive? According to new research, the answer is “no.”

You remember that website that used to be popular, HOTorNOT.com, which allows visitors to rate the attractiveness of random, anonymous photographs, right? Well, researchers are using the site to conduct research into people’s attractiveness and perceptions of attractiveness, because now it includes a dating component too. A team led by Leonard Lee (2008) from Columbia University recently looked into the question of whether our own attractiveness biases affect our perceptions of those we date using the site.

There is an existing body of research, as the investigators note, that show that physically attractive people tend to date other physically attractive people. For reasons not entirely clear, we all tend to gravitate to our own level of attractiveness (as well as socio-economic class, race, and social circles). That’s why the beautiful people in Us Weekly and People all inter-date and marry. That’s also why rich people tend to marry other rich people (sorry to dash your hopes there!). Naturally, since our society places a great deal on a certain idea of physical attractiveness, such people are also more popular dates. And since beauty seems to be a universal constant no matter what the culture (based upon factors such as facial features and waist to hip ratios), it’s hard to get away from the influence of attractiveness in dating and mating.

Some theories that have been put forward about why these biases exist include evolutionary (helps to maximize the attractive, more “fit” genes), market forces (attractive people want other attractive people, so they’re not left choosing from the less attractive), and parental influence (we look for mates who resemble our parents! Yikes.).

The current study touches upon a psychological mumbo-jumbo theory called “cognitive dissonance.” When a person chooses someone they believe to be less attractive than themselves, they must try and reduce the internal conflict regarding this choice. “Hey, I’m pretty good looking, why did I choose someone obviously less so than myself? Is there something wrong with me?” In order to reduce that internal and unconscious conflict and resolve the discrepancy, so goes the theory, they might persuade themselves that the person they chose is actually more physically appealing than initially thought. And others would agree.

So the researcher set out to test this hypothesis using the HOTorNOT.com website and its dating component. (The researchers also ran a separate experiment to ensure that “hot” people on the website really were rated as being attractive by folks in the real-world, which they were, confirming the validity of the HOTorNOT data.) They examined two different sets of data — 2,386,267 rating decisions by 16,550 members looking for meeting requests (dating) and 447,082 rating decisions made by 5,467 members just randomly rating the attractiveness of others on the site (not looking for a date). These data were taken from a 10-day period in the summer of 2005.

This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission.
Article contributed by
Advanced Member

John M. Grohol

Psychologist

Dr. John Grohol is a mental health expert and founder of Psych Central. He has been writing about online behavior, mental health and psychology issues, and the intersection of technology and psychology since 1992.

Location: Newburyport, MA
Credentials: PsyD
Website: PsychCentral
Other Articles/News by John M. Grohol:

Why Can't Your Partner Talk About Feelings?

By

Emotions give us important information that we can use to better understand our needs, priorities and limits. We can use emotions to set boundaries and make decisions. Unfortunately, effective communication about feelings isn't always easy. "If you're not authentically experiencing, expressing, and learning from your emotions, then that erodes ... Read more

Jealousy Ruining Your Life? Fix It By Figuring Out The Real Cause

By

Jealousy can be a problem in any type of relationship and can appear in anyone’s life at any time. You can have jealousy with other people's things, their success, their beauty, their athletic prowess, their relationship, their kids, their education, their money, and their life. It can be a tiny feeling in your gut or it can be an overwhelming ... Read more

Be Happy — It's Not Just For Your Sake

By

In case you hadn't noticed, there's been a wealth of information recently in the form of books, TV shows, CDs, DVDs, magazine articles, and even movies on a subject that is near and dear to everyone's heart. The subject is happiness. I'm not sure why it is that there seems to be more interest in happiness these days than there has been in the ... Read more

See More

PARTNER POSTS
Latest Expert Videos
ASK YOURTANGO MORE QUESTIONS
Most Popular