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9 Steps to a Happy Marriage


Looking to improve your marriage? Follow these suggestions from a leading family counselor.

This guest article from PsychCentral was written by Nathan Feiles, LMSW.

Relationships tend to be the most balanced when the foundation is strong. If you can get the basics down, you're much more likely to have a long-lasting and happy marriage.

Here are nine steps to a happy marriage (or non-married relationship):

1. Worry about your own relationship.
Couples can make the mistake of paying too much attention to what’s going on in the relationships around them, and making comparisons to how other people's relationships function. What works for their relationship may not work for yours, and vice versa. Stick to what works for you and your partner, even if it seems to go against the grain of others.

2. No mind-reading.
It can feel really good to have your partner read your mind in just the right way. When it happens, it's incredibly validating, and it can make everything in your relationship seem right. However, when it doesn't go this way (most likely the majority of the time), it ends up being frustrating and disappointing. Often people watch their relationships slowly crumble as they sit around frustratingly waiting for the non-communicated fantasy to come true, which leads to the inevitable explosion of, "You never do [these things] for me!" If you have something in mind, don't wait around waiting for magic. Communicate what you want. It may not feel as good as having your mind read, but it will put you and your partner on the same page about your needs and desires. Keep reading...

More how to save your marriage advice from YourTango: 

This article was originally published at PsychCentral. Reprinted with permission from the author.


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