The first step in opening to intimacy is to find your center. Figure out who you are, what you like and don’t like, and how you want to be treated and spoken to. Then become a champion for yourself—stick up for yourself as you would defend a young child. Learn how to take care of yourself, figure out what needs you have and learn how to get those needs met. This may rock your relationship boat at first, but ultimately it will make it stronger.
Real romance is only possible when both partners can stand on their own two feet. True intimacy is only possible when both partners are willing to be vulnerable in the face of the other; to offer your open heart knowing that the other has to ability to reject you, but that rejection will not alter the love you have for yourself. Intimacy begins in your own heart; it is a grand love affair with yourself.