Most men are confused about what a woman really wants; I know I am. We can assume that it’s the diamond ring or the nice house in the nice neighborhood or making sure the family’s needs are met or being a good father or completing the honey-do list, etc. These things (and so many more!) are, in my opinion, the basics of what a woman deserves.
Unfortunately, most men busy themselves with making the grade on what is virtually required, to some extent, to maintain the relationship. The real work is to discover the wants, needs and desires of our woman in addition to the basics. Actually, I think that’s the thing that women crave. It’s just not enough to be taken care of. Surprise me, excite me, shock me is what women seem to be silently screaming to their men. Some women may be directly expressing this sentiment to deaf ears; that’s sad for the relationship.
Problem is, for us guys that really want to bring that gorgeous smile to your face, it isn’t always that easy to figure out what makes that happen. We will ask, we will be told, we will sleuth and even when it seems that we’ve figured it out, it changes. I know a lot of us men could use some education in the areas of creativity and spontaneity. Women have seemingly expressed what they want to me only to want something totally different even a few hours later. What gives?
Surely, from a man’s perspective, it’s important to have options and a contingency plan, yet in a relationship, shouldn’t these things be open and obvious? I’ve heard that women like mystery in a man. What men like is certainty. Let’s face it: we are and will likely always be a mystery to one another. The purpose of this discussion is to encourage women to be clear on how to please them.
What men do, when we see the objective, is take it on as a mission. We get committed to the thing that dazzles you. If you want uniqueness in the outcome, keep giving us a new mission and the chance to succeed and we’ll die trying. Want to frustrate a man? Let him go the distance or be heading distinctly in that direction, then change your mind. Most people cannot stand for confusion; men are no exception. Give a man an opportunity to succeed and he will likely find a way and do it again and again; that’s how we work. Take away that success and most guys lose interest in trying. To make matters worse, you’ll let us do your bidding, then ignore or criticize our efforts. That’s a no-win situation.
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