Finding someone, either online or otherwise, that you click with is a trying task. So when you do, most of us fight to see it through to the end. Admittedly, I have been fooled by instant chemistry into believing that Mr. Dead Ends were going to be my relationship status changers. Inevitably, they either slowly faded away or even worse, just disappeared from my dating life. Looking back, there were always waving red flags that I ignored or was simply too smitten to realize at the time. Here are three warning signs that can save you time and wasted expectations:
1. Texting is your main form of communication – If Mr. Too Good To Be True never finds the time to hear your voice, he may not be taking your relationship as seriously as you think. This also begs the question, who else is he texting? Texting may be the new phone call among most communicators but when it comes to the beginning of a relationship, a more personal dialogue should be happening.
2. Conversation is one sided – I recently spent time with an interesting, brooding artist. He had passionate opinions about everything and I was drawn to his intensity. We discussed his life and his interests in overwhelming detail and I mistakenly assumed that our connection was as deep as his self-revelations. Until one day he vanished (in other words, stopped calling) and I realized that he never stopped to ask about me. Looking back, I now understand that if he truly was sizing me up to be the lead in his next real relationship, he would have spent more time delving into me as a participant and not treating me as a member of his audience.
3. Your gut tells you so – Sometimes, according to the rules of dating, everything makes sense. He’s calling – you are spending a great deal of time together – maybe he even asks to meet your parents. But if your gut starts begging for your heart to hit the breaks, you may want to stop and listen.