Come On Baby, Light My Fire!


Come On Baby, Light My Fire!
Transform your relationship from dysfunctional to loving and lasting.

     So many relationships are unconsciously created as a result of unfinished business with our source relationships; our mothers and fathers.  So, unwittingly we search out partners whom we actually hire for the job to attempt to resolve our unresolved childhood issues.  They are usually the perfect match.  So the patterns learned from childhood get re-enacted with what we think is our “soul mate”, only to discover that the “soul mate” is really a replica of the parent we had the most difficulty with.  Unless we have a professional who understands the theory of recapitulation, (repeating the past) and has tools to help couples work through their “stuck” places, there is little or no hope to move the relationship forward to a mature level of intimacy and healthy relational space.  It’s the relational space that we live in.  It’s the same space that our children play in.  So we have an obligation as partners to help clean up that space to make it safe and once again sacred. When this is accomplished, the dopamine levels rise again, but with a new landscape of pleasure that’s better than before. This is when passion transcends into relational maturity.  It doesn’t get better than this!

     Follow me along with this concept of transforming your relationship from dysfunctional to loving and lasting.  I will present seven true stories over the next seven weeks that will give you an opportunity to visit real people with real problems and be a part of their personal recovery and self-actualized relationships. 

Next week:  OH WHERE OH WHERE HAS MY SEXY SELF GONE? Barbara’s Story

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Joan Childs

Marriage/Couples Counselor

"The highest compliment I can receive is the referral of your friends, family and business associates. Thank you for your confidence and trust!"

Joan E Childs

Location: Hallandale, FL
Credentials: LCSW
Other Articles/News by joan Childs:

10 Fair Fighting Rules


Everyone knows that there is no intimacy without conflict; unless of course, you agree never to disagree. Then, you don't have a healthy relationship; you have codependency.  In healthy relationships, neither party subjugates their feelings to please the other. Conflicts need to be externalized and resolved. Couples need to have rules to argue by. Here ... Read more

SEX and Addiction


Barbara: I stood alone, not for the first time, with a sense of pride and humility, holding the mike in my hands, once again, about to share my story.  I looked around the room and saw the faces of so many brethren who were trying to pull their lives together; so many who were called “the old timers”, some who were called the “newcomers ... Read more

SEX in The Other City


Beth: Alex and I were married twenty five years.  We had three children; 2 boys, Sam age 23, Brian, age 20 and a daughter, Kim, age 18.  The first ten years of our marriage had been good.  Although Alex was not a demonstrative man, I always knew he loved me and our relationship was satisfying to us both.  For some inexplicable reason, after ... Read more

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