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How Is Your Love Defined?

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love
Let your relationship go from an attraction to a lifelong commitment of true love!
Discover the three phases of love and how each phase draws different aspects of you.

Attachment and commitment are central in long-term relationships. Marriage cannot happen without these key ingredients. The pathways to attachment and commitment are developed initially in infancy with your primary caregiver. This is part of your emotional and social development and is necessary for your survival. As an infant, you attached to adults who were sensitive, responsive and consistent in their care for you. These caregivers or attachment figures became a source of security and based on their responses, you developed patterns of attachment. These primary relationships became your relationship blueprint guiding your perceptions, emotions, beliefs and expectations for future romantic relationships. This is why when you fall in love it feels like you have always known him or her...your other half. 5 Ways To Be Happy About Your Love Life Right Now!

There's a lot of work that goes on in this phase. You are building a home and a life together; you're establishing careers and perhaps raising a family. At times, your different styles and personalities harmonize and at other times, clash. What's important here is to be sensitive, responsive and consistent—be present and available to your partner and your relationship. Checking out mentally or emotionally can run the peril of riding a run-away train with no one at the helm.

More from YourTango: 7 Cheap Ways Not To Fail At Romance This Valentines

It takes conscious effort to maintain attitudes that ensure the success of your relationship. A perspective of a glass half full, works better than the glass half empty to keep you together. It's important you see the best in your mate; acknowledge and appreciate each other. The actions and the choices you make—even when you don't feel in love and at times may even question it—determine whether or not you sustain a satisfying relationship and keep love alive. 3 Ways To Attract Your Mate Through Self Love

In real love, your attitudes matter. Your actions matter. The choices you make matter. Being responsible matters. Having fun matters. Pleasure matters. Real love brings two strangers together for the dance of a lifetime. It gives you the opportunity to co-create the lives you desire and leads to deep personal growth and fulfillment like no other relationship offers.

In real love, each partner takes great care to satisfy the other's needs and regards the other as his or her most valued prize; held in high esteem and with gratitude. There is a great sense of security and freedom in this form of love which comes with time. Statistically, lasting love has a greater chance in marriage than in cohabitation. Perhaps, it's for the single notion of commitment. 12 Tips For Improving Your Relationship

Real love guides us to live in peace and with vitality. It teaches us to have courage to face and rise above the challenges life brings. It inspires us to a spirit of generosity and kindness. It leads us to live with dignity and honor. And it reminds us to be quick to forgive as this is the journey of love.

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Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Jianny Adamo

Author

Jianny Adamo

Licensed Psychotherapist & Relationship Coach

Coming soon: FearLess in Love: Seven Secrets to Lasting Love

www.fearlesslove.net

954-495-4566

Location: Delray Beach, FL
Credentials: LMHC, LPC, MA, NCC
Specialties: Communication Problems, Couples/Marital Issues, Dating/Being Single Support, Marriage, Spiritual
Other Articles/News by Jianny Adamo:

7 Cheap Ways Not To Fail At Romance This Valentines

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Are you burning the midnight oil trying to figure out what to get your sweetie this Valentine’s Day? Do you feel pressure instead of pleasure in having to prove your love each year?  The truth is romance doesn’t prove your love -- it keeps it strong. Romance is an essential element of keeping the flame alive in your ... Read more

Anger: Good or Bad for Your Relationship?

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Does anger belong in your relationship, or better yet, in your life?  Is it Okay to express anger or is it a deadly sin? Depending on culture, religious beliefs and personality, you will find different answers, but make no mistake, anger is a controversial topic. Just this week in bible study, I got into a heated debate on the topic of anger. Part of ... Read more

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