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Dear God, I Just Want To Be Happy (Pretty Please)


The real reason for your unhappiness will shock you.

Have you ever asked yourself, who am I wasting my life for?

According to a study from the Harvard University, you lose 50 percent of your life by doing multiple things at once.

Who are we multitasking for 24/7?  Who gets those extra years that we loose?  It’s not our children, or our partners.  If the people that matter most, don’t benefit from our mental absence, why do we continue to miss out on our lives?

The Unceasing Cycle

What’s going on?

The media constantly shows us what a perfect life looks like, and they make it look easy (if we use their products)!  The actors have flawless skin and perky derrieres, and manage life with sufficient stamina to outlast a housewife on Ritalin.

The messages are always the same, we’re told that we’re not enough and here’s how to fix it.

Your solution could be an Electrolux oven that’ll afford you more time.  For me, it’ll be the $200 facial cream that guarantees to reverse aging.

Once You’re Hooked You Equate: “Me + Product = Happy”

We’re scammed on a minute-by-minute basis by the best con artists in the world, advertisers.

They have studied, analyzed, and tracked our habits to the point that they deliver ads with painful precision.

The Sequestering Process Begins

The media paints the picture that everyone else is blissfully happy.  So when nothing seems to help and the world appears content, we hide.  

Once in a while we’ll peak out from behind our drawn curtains (via Facebook) to check and see if anyone else is struggling, but they never are.

Is Everyone Successful At Life But Me?

No.  They’re just as scared to be vulnerable and hide behind their perfect facade, which compounds our entrapment. 

This is exactly what the advertisers want, for us to be isolated, unsure, and feel bad about ourselves.  That way we’ll chomp down on their next deliciously baited hook. 

The Heartbreaking End Result

We become so preoccupied with our flaws that we ramp up our busyness to quiet the negative internal reel.

Whether you’re busy with work or mindless multitasking, you miss your life, while you pay for empty promises and lies. 

When will it be enough for us to give these outrageous societal standards the middle finger and get back to the basics?

Will you stand up with me and do life differently for our sons and daughters?

How do we change things?  The key to putting a wrench in society’s gluttonous plan is simple awareness.

What that change looks like, is up to you.  It may only be a pause before the next time you swipe your AMEX, or opening up to a friend like you never have before.  Telling the truth about your struggles.

It’s not easy to stand up for something that’s different.  But it beats the buyer’s remorse that cripples you and the enormous guilt you feel when you have to work, yet again to pay for the latest purchase.

You NEVER Know When Your Time Is Up

I look at time different than most.  I’m keenly aware that at any moment my life or the lives of those that I love most could end.

I’m 34 years old and I’ve been married for almost ten years.  We have a daughter that’s 7 and a son that’s almost 6.

Essentially, I’ve lost 17 years of my life, 5 years of my marriage, 3.5 years of my daughter’s life, and 3 years of my son’s, from doing too much rather than simply showing up and being present.

I’m done wasting my life for a lie.  AND you should be too.

The truth is that YOU ARE ENOUGH.  You’re worthy of happiness because you are intrinsically valuable, not because you DO IT ALL and have the BIGGEST AND BEST STUFF.

You deserve to live a life with true connection and intimacy.  That’s where authentic happiness lies, not in the superficial retail world or the standards set by society.

Happiness is appreciating what surrounds you, not chasing after teasers dangled in front of your nose.

Remember, change begins with awareness, and now that you have it you can’t lose it.

Be brave and pull back your curtains.  Let the truth shine out for others to witness.   Your courage to be vulnerable will create a domino affect and give other’s permission to do the same.

Listen to what they’re selling and remember, happiness doesn’t come in a box, it comes from within and you my friend already have it.

Jessica is the author of Back 2 Love and How to Start a Mental Health Private Practice.  Follow her on Twitter where she tweets top relationship tips: @back_2_love_

This article was originally published at South Metro Counseling. Reprinted with permission from the author.


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