to the YourTango newsletter!

Continue to Site »»

ProConnect

Happy Valentines Day?

By . Posted on .

Happy Valentines Day?
Valentine's Day often doesn't feel like a bed of roses, particularly when we are single.

Happy Valentines Day? Well it depends. When I was single it didn't feel very happy at all. The barrage of happy couples on TV, reminders every time I turned around to buy the latest jewelry trinket for the relationship that I didn't have, and this feverish feeling that everyone but me has a picturesque relationship. In fact, Valentines day, aka Singles Awareness Day, often feels like the stupidest or the saddest thing ever. The end of this week cannot get here soon enough.


And at the risk of popping any bubbles, once you are in a relationship they are far from roses and gumdrops. Often. Sure, they can be beautiful and one of the most rewarding undertakings that we ever set our hearts to. But there are plenty of metaphorical scrapes and bruises along the way.

More from YourTango: How To Get That First Kiss

"Valentines Day: Because relationships aren't complicated enough." 

In fact, relationships can produce some of the most acute pain ever experienced. One of my favorite analogies for dating and relationships is that of a marathon. None of us roll out of bed ready to run 26.2 miles. It requires regular training, beginning with a 1 mile run, building up to 5 miles and so forth.  With persistence, perhaps some good coaching, and sufficient training, anyone can take on a marathon. To connect the analogy, dating is the training and the relationship is the marathon. In both cases, there are spills and injuries and setbacks. And in both cases, the marathon or relationship are incredibly satisfying goals to achieve. Once we've actually run the marathon or chosen a relationship, we certainly have to continue the training process to stay marathon/relationship ready. And the good news is, whether you talk to marathon great Dean Karnazes (aka Ultramarathon Man who ran 50 marathons in 50 states in 50 consecutive days) or anyone who's been in a relationship for many years, it does get easier.

More from YourTango: 7 More Keys Women Need For Dating

"Every runner can." -Dean Karnazes

And I would add to what Dean says, "Every Dater Can," or "Every Relationshipper Can." It starts with a step, then a mile, and with persistence, the sky is the limit. Just ask Arthur, who was crippled and told by Doctors for 15 years that he would never walk again, and now he does things that many of us only dream about. So whether you are single or in a relationship, perhaps feeling a little crippled, tired, frustrated, or uncertain and wanting to take your next step toward your marathon, I would love to hear from you.

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Jeremi McManus

Dating Coach

Jeremi McManus, founder of SF Relationship Coaching, is a Dating and Relationship Coach who works with people who want fulfilling relationships and more of them. “Everyone needs some direction and support in dating and relationships from time to time, and if you feel like you could use some then I look forward to hearing from you.” He received a Master’s in Counseling in 2009, loves taking rides on his vintage Honda motorcycle, and calls San Francisco home.

Location: San Francisco, CA
Credentials: MS
Other Articles/News by Jeremi McManus:

How To Get That First Kiss

By

So there you are, the date is coming to a close, you're in the car or walking her back to her house from Muni. Heart is pounding. Sweat breaks out across your brow even though it's a characteristic 52 degrees in San Francisco. You've planned out the perfect kiss but are still nervous as hell as to whether she's going to be down and reciprocate. ... Read more

7 More Keys Women Need For Dating

By

In Part 1 of this article, we looked at the biggest dating mistake women make and how to feel more comfortable in social situations. In today’s Part II, Dating & Relationship Coach, Jeremi McManus, continues to share advice and tips from his years of experience with client.  Let’s jump right in: Vitra: Modern day women are often ... Read more

7 Keys Women Need For Dating

By

[Interview by Vitra Singh for Diva Gossip] Doing dating right can be a challenge for men and women who just want to meet “the right one.” Diving in haphazardly without stopping to think about what you are looking for, qualities that are essential, and how to bring up some tough talk can hurt more than help. Male Dating & Relationship ... Read more

See More

Recent Expert Posts
Oh My

The 13 year itch in marriage should I stay or should I go?

More couples are getting divorced after the ten year mark in marriage, could you be next...

Gaze

How to Connect with that Special Woman During the First Months

How do you show someone that you feel that you are special and you mean the world to them?

Feed Me

The Goals of Controlling Behavior In Relationships

Do you try to control how your partner behaves or how your partner feels about you?

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

Resources
How to find the right pro for you
10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

YourTango Experts can help your business go from good to great.

10 Steps To Improve Your Coaching Business

Take your coaching business from mediocre to great in no time…

Frequently Asked Questions About YourTango Experts

Thinking of joining? Here's all the facts you need to know to make the most of your membership.

Getting Your Guy To Join You In A Therapy Or Coaching Session

So how can your get your strong, self-reliant, superman to talk to an Expert with you?

Therapist/Counselors: Who We Are & What We Do

What exactly does a therapist/counselor do and can they really help?

See more resources>
HOT STUFF!
FROM OUR PARTNERS