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The Key To Overcoming A Painful Divorce

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The Key To Overcoming A Painful Divorce [EXPERT]
Do you have the key?
Are you struggling to move on from a difficult divorce? YourTango Expert Jerald Young can help.

The Five Necessary Qualifications for Your "Transition Partner"

Beware of good friends who want to please. They may not have the courage to help. Kate's life would have been vastly different had she chosen a transition partner who had these five, critical qualifications. A good TP will:

More from YourTango: 8 Ways Your Anger Will Break Up Your Relationship

  1. No personal agenda. Their only concern is your happiness regardless of what form the arrangement may ultimately take.
  2. Truth-telling ... even when it is not what you want to hear.
  3. Personal experience. You want a TP who has been divorced before, so he/she can truly understand what you are dealing with.
  4. Availability ... to talk with you regularly, frequently, and in depth.
  5. Non-judgmental. He/ she should be willing to withold judgment and advice.

If you select a TP that meets these requirements and if you give him/her permission to do their job, then the odds of dramatically speeding up your recovery skyrocket. Ironically, this rules out the obvious choices: most friends, family members and lovers. All these people almost always have a preferred solution they want us to accept.

Pick Carefully. Pick wisely. Adjustment becomes almost routine. Pick poorly and the consequences are measured in the number of years lost.

More from YourTango: Is Your Ex A Sociopath Or A Narcissist?

If you would like a set of instructions to give to your transition partner so he or she can be most effective in helping you recover from divorce, please click here. Would you like to end the pain of divorce and speed up your return to the mainstream of life? Jerald Young is a Divorce Recovery Coach who walks people through the rehabilitation needed after divorce. He is the founder of Smooth Divorce Recovery.

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Jerald Young

Divorce Coach

Jerald Young, Ph.D.
Founder of Smooth Divorce Recovery.
I am a Divorce Recovery Coach. I help individuals end the pain of divorce so they can put their lives back together in months rather than years.

Look for my forthcoming book in early 2013:
The Book on Divorce Recovery: How to Avoid the 14 Common Mistakes that Prevent a Successful Recovery from Divorce

 

 

 

 

 

Location: Saint Paul, MN
Credentials: PhD
Specialties: Divorce/Divorce Prevention, Life Transitions
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