7 tips to earn your partners trust!
Our world is going through such a shift in consciousness. It’s something astonishing whereby we are questioning the trustworthiness of strangers, our neighbors, co-workers, families, companions—and even ourselves. We are getting to the point where trusting is becoming so taboo, that we save it for only the most private of relationships—our partners, our best friends, our siblings and parents? This is self-defeating phenomenon.
Have you noticed in your current relationship that there is hint of distrust? I mean, you are doing all that you feel is possible to make him (her) believe that you are being honest, but nothing seems to be working. You’ve put all of this energy into getting them to trust you and you are still being accused of doing wrong. How ironic is that? How frustrating is that?
In every relationship that we encounter, we also experience the baggage that we’ll call, “past experiences.” Past experiences are the number one reason people have a difficult time moving forward. They’ve been so disappointed, hurt, abandoned, or abused in their past, that they are allowing this to dictate the future and predict the responses of others. So, if you are doing the right thing, give yourself a pat on the back, because it probably isn’t your fault at all. Their distrust probably came before you.
So, let’s begin with what trust means? Merriam-Webster defines trust as assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something. So, if that’s what trust means, then how can you cause someone to deem you worthy of assured reliance on the character, ability, strength or truth of yourself? In other words, how can you get someone to consider you trustworthy? Below are a few tips. If you completely follow these tips you will find that not only will your partner begin to trust you, but you will have a much closer and connected relationship.
1)Confess: If you’ve told a lie in the past (and you really want to cleanse your relationship of that drama), just admit to it. Clearing the air is a great way to begin your process to trustworthiness. Of course, it’s not as easy as it sounds, but just know that if you can do this—then sky is the limit.
2) Be Truthful. From this moment forward, do your best to tell the truth, consistently. The more you get into the habit of doing this, the easier it will be come and the more practice you will give your partner to better handle their response to your honest truths.
3) Be Consistent: This is probably the easiest for us to do as it is pretty natural to be consistent in your actions to an extent. Be who you’ve always been whether it’s crazy and spontaneous, or introverted and a homebody. The moment you change your ways, it could cause eyebrows to rise and questions about your behavior to arise.
4) Notice of Unpredictability. If you are about to do (or have done) something that is outside of your norm, talk with your partner about this. If you typically speak on the phone in front of them, and for whatever reason you need to go into the other room, simply explain to your partner beforehand or afterward. Don’t let those wheels start spinning. The worst thing for your partner to do is to begin fantasizing about what that conversation was really about. It’s not necessary for it to even make it to that point.
5) Volunteer Information: Don’t ask, don’t tell relationships further add to suspicion. You only give your partner the permission to imagine what the real scenario could have been. Even though there are plenty of opportunities to be vague in relationships, the worst thing you can do is to take it. If you receive an unexpected email from your ex, just volunteer this information to your partner. The greatest thing about volunteering information is to demonstrate that you have nothing to hide. Period.
6) Be Dependable. Don’t promise something in which you cannot follow through. The more you begin to disappoint people, the less they will trust you. Dependability is a high indicator of trustworthiness.
7) Practice What You Preach. Don’t just say something, do it. Allow your actions be the clearest indicator of your trustworthiness. If you say that you can keep something to yourself (i.e. a secret or gossip), just do it. If you can do this, your reputation will begin to speak for itself.