Continue to Site »»

ProConnect

How My Husband's Affair Changed My Life ... For The Best

By . Posted on .

How My Husband's Affair Changed My Life ... For The Best [EXPERT]
An affair isn't always all bad news.
His infidelity was my worst nightmare come true ... but it was also a blessing in disguise.

How would I survive this? I was grief stricken. On the nights I snuggled with my two babies on my queen-sized marriage bed, I felt so alone.

It was a process, and not a short one, but day by day, one moment at a time, I learned to love myself again. I accepted that his betrayal was not about me; it was about him.

More from YourTango: Cry, Admit You Did It, and Find Joy

It wasn't the fact that his "soulmate" returned to her husband just days before my ex and she were to elope, and it wasn't even the fact that men found me attractive, and I had opportunities for love again. It was that I learned to love myself and to accept that the challenges I was facing would help me to grow, to learn, and to hope again. And, they did.

Four years later, I married the man of my dreams. This somewhat conservative, yet open-minded and accepting guy loved me for who I was and opened his heart to my children.  We took it slowly, in order to ensure that it was a good move for our kids before blending our two families. He had sadly lost his young wife to breast cancer after having a little boy together at nearly the same time my marriage suddenly ended. 

We didn't know one another then, but we later learned we had lived parallel lives. Now, we've been together for 11 years and we are going strong.  No red flags, no doubts and no fears … only love, faith and moderate politics. Bliss! 5 Ways To Be Happy About Your Love Life Right Now!

Well, not really. Life hasn't been a fairy tale since we married; we've had our ups and downs, deaths and losses, hardships and challenges. Who wouldn't with three teens at home, a beautifully complicated blended/extended family, and many aging grandparents?  Yet, my ex has been a devoted dad and co-parent, and we have learned to forgive each other and ourselves over time.

More from YourTango: How I Will Survive Valentine's Day Without My First Love

Despite the rollercoaster ride, I have learned from my sadness and grown through my tears. I am thankful for every moment and I'm blessed to know true love; for my husband and for myself. My dream is to help women like me, who have loved and lost, to rebuild their hearts and find hope and happiness again. And they will. 4 Ways To Cheat-Proof Your Marriage

Recent Expert Posts
Liquor

"Watch Me;" The Self-Centered influence of Social Media

Most toddlers and teens grow out of being self-centered. What happens when they don't? This and more

Banana

Masturbation in the Library

Books only, no masturbation please, that's how I like my library

Change Ahead

Day 16 & 17 - This is Gonna Take Something

Reclaiming Your Vitality - The Journey

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

Resources
How to find the right pro for you
10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

YourTango Experts can help your business go from good to great.

10 Steps To Improve Your Coaching Business

Take your coaching business from mediocre to great in no time…

Frequently Asked Questions About YourTango Experts

Thinking of joining? Here's all the facts you need to know to make the most of your membership.

Getting Your Guy To Join You In A Therapy Or Coaching Session

So how can your get your strong, self-reliant, superman to talk to an Expert with you?

Therapist/Counselors: Who We Are & What We Do

What exactly does a therapist/counselor do and can they really help?

See more resources>
HOT STUFF!
FROM OUR PARTNERS