The Tantric Art of Making Love

Love, Sex



Tantra is both a spiritual practice and sexual philosophy, yet it is not a religion or system that involves restrictions, denial or deprivation of any kind. In fact the practice of Tantra often encourages followers to explore and dispel taboos. Tantra is a practice of consciously saying yes to life and yes to new experiences. There really are no rules against anything pleasurable or mutually consensual in Tantra, especially no rules forbidding orgasms or even ejaculating. Tantra is practiced across many cultures, and in conjunction with various religious and cultural beliefs that sometimes get mixed up with the pure practice of Tantra. Sex without any ejaculation at all is a practice that I believe stems from a cultural / spiritual belief that is not purely tantric in origin, but rather a philosophy of longevity that is practiced by some Hindus and Taoists. There is a belief that preserving the ejaculation fluid inside your body preserves your life force energy and therefore prolongs your life.  However, this is not a belief held or practiced by all Tantric lovers around the world.  The majority of American and European Tantric lovers that I know do not feel compelled to practice a strict form of non-ejaculation with tantric sex. However, prolonging arousal or postponing climax to allow the energy to reach a higher level is often practiced as a way to expand awareness and orgasmic bliss.

The art of prolonging pleasure without reaching climax is described in the Kama Sutra, the Hindu sex manual written in the 4th century. "Karezza" is the term used to define a practice of the male pleasuring his partner and prolonging their intercourse by perpetuating his state of orgasm without actually ejaculating. With practice, he may experience a sensation of internal and sometimes multiple internal orgasms.  Some people refer to this type of orgasm as a dry orgasm because it happens without ejaculation. A dry orgasm is pleasurable, yet still allows the sexual act to continue, prolonging the state of orgasmic bliss for a couple's mutual enjoyment. The art of Karezza incorporates breath control, meditation, work with postures, and finger pressure into the sexual act.

The Kama Sutra speaks about Karezza as a male practice; however, females can also expand their orgasmic experience in a similar fashion.  Although ejaculation control is not a female issue of concern, many of the same basic principles of extending and expanding orgasmic awareness through breath control, meditation, postures and touch apply to the feminine sexual experience as well. Plus, females who previously have had difficulty achieving an orgasm during sex, perhaps have never experienced multiple orgasms, have never experienced internal g-spot pleasure, or female ejaculation before, can often open up their ability to experience more pleasure and a whole variety of new types of  orgasms with a little practice and support from a patient Tantric lover.

There are some really good Tantric techniques for ejaculation control, or delaying ejaculation that you may want to explore to enhance your orgasmic experience. The point is not to deprive you or your partner of anything, but rather to allow for broadening your definition and experience to include more pleasure, and an expanded view of sexuality. Experimenting with ways to prolonging love making for your mutual pleasure is encouraged in Tantric practice.  However, I personally think there is room in the tantrika’s repertoire for an occasional quickie. However, I would like to suggest that this not be the only option available to you, and would hope that you would make time on a regular basis for luxurious Tantric love making sessions with your partner.

Why Might Someone Wish to Experience Tantra? My first response would be in the form of a question. I would ask “why not?” Perhaps it would be to explore sensuality within a spiritual context, or to heal old sexual wounds or traumas that inhibit your full sexual expression. Perhaps it would be to build confidence as a lover or enhance intimacy with your beloved. One of the primary purposes of tantra is to awaken the Kundalini; a very powerful, intense and healing form of energy that can make us feel younger, more alive and vibrant. When kundalini is awakened, it can travel up through the spine, releasing blocked energy, igniting the transformational powers of each of the seven chakras. The result is higher states of awareness, improved health and often euphoric states of pleasure. 

If you are interested in learning more about tantra, scheduling a Love Life Coaching or Tantric Session with me, please take a look at my website:


Expert advice

Save your breath because you only need two words to make him commit.
Are you REALLY thinking about their happiness?
If you keep finding yourself in heartbreaking, dead end relationships, listen up.
It seems like you can't do anything right.

Explore YourTango