Another concept that I think goes hand and hand with the Platinum Rule is to recognize our partner’s primary love language. According to Gary Chapman who wrote the book about this concept, there are 5 Love Languages; words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time and physical touch. All five are valid ways of expressing and experiencing love, and we may enjoy all of them at times, but we all seem to have a favorite or primary way that makes us feel especially loved. I think it is important to understanding both our own love language as well as our partner’s love language to effectively communicate and express love.
The bottom line, pay attention! Get to know your partner, how they experience love, and what makes them light up. The most effective expressions of love are ones that show you listen to what they say, see who they are, notice what they like and pay attention to what matters most to them. Once you are aware of how your partner likes to be treated, then you can communicate true love.