Expert Blog Compelling advice, stories, and thought-provoking perspectives straight from YourTango's lineup of Experts to you

The Secret to Living a Peaceful Life

Love, Self

Managing mental chatter is essential to living a life of joy and peace.

The secret to living a life of connection and joy is to keep your mind clear and clean of garbage.  What is garbage you ask?  It is criticism, guilt, shame, worry, gossip – all things negative. 

How does one do that you ask?  By monitoring your thoughts.  A thought is a wave of energy that flows through your mind.  Most of them have been triggered by the news, television, conversations and interactions through the day, and programming from family, teachers, and various groups.  Sounds like a lot – well, maybe.  The point is that a thought is an energy impulse that you can listen to and respond to or not.  It can just be there like traffic noise in the background.

Observe your thoughts without reacting to them.  You will begin to notice trends and patterns.   Are you a worry wart – you are living in the future.  Are you guilt ridden, you are living in the past.  Do you run conversations over and over in your mind? If so, you are creating anxiety and second guessing. 

Now here’s the good part.  When you notice a negative thought, step back from it.  Do not engage.  Remember, it is just an energy impulse, let it flow by.  The reason people get into trouble is that they take their thoughts seriously and act on compulsions and impulses without considering their source or consequences.  To an alcoholic, I want a drink.  Observe it and let it go.  Same with drug addicts, sex addicts, shopping addicts, any addict. 

Essentially we are all addicts in some way.  Notice what your addiction is.  Maybe it is the need for attention, or wanting approval.  Again, notice these thoughts as they arise and let them go.  Yes, it is hard if you don’t replace it with something else.  The thought you are releasing take up space.  So put something else in that space.  Be ready with a new thought, one that will keep your mind open and fresh.  Gratitude is a good one.  Thank yourself for noticing the thought and letting it go.  Be grateful for a beautiful day or for sunshine.  Be grateful for having legs to walk and speech to share ideas.  There are a million things for which to be grateful .  Why do you want this?  It is simple - gratitude elevates your mind. 

As you learn to clear space by letting go of useless thoughts, you are learning to allow the light of the Universe to shine through.  Practice being quiet - even with yourself.  When more thoughts arise – shhhh!  I am quiet now. 

This is all about self-discipline -- to take control of YOUR mind.  Like driving a car, you get to decide where your vehicle is headed and the mental exercise is you decide what thoughts are allowed and which ones are not.  Where do you want to take your mind?  You can drive it DOWN in negativity, which create restriction, upset, depression and chaos.  Or you can navigate it UP to uplifting thoughts and possibilities. Just the act of clearing it of negativity is transformative.  

So the exercise is:  observe your thoughts.  Let them flow.  Then disengage from uninspiring ones and shift to peace.  Equating a beautiful image to peace – like a serene forest or park, the ocean, sitting on the porch on a sunny day, watching the sunrise or set – will help.  Have the image ready so you can go there quickly.  Gratitude always ascends the energy of the mi


Explore YourTango