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The conditions for your sex life are there because of the understanding you have of your personal sexuality more than anything else.   Once there is this personal understanding, then all the messages about sexuality find their place for us indivdually.  There are many ways to get to know our own sexuality intimately.  You can begin by describing one of your most sensual memories such as camping out or eating a winter meal by a fire.  Find out what sensuous experiences you derive the most pleasure from and what those feelings are like.  This can have a snowballing effect where you may start out mildly sensing what matters to you then find it wakes you up to more sensual experiences and builds to a crescendo, intensifying your passions.  Like good sex.

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