Successful Men Are Attracted To Successful Women


Successful Men Are Attracted To Successful Women
Don't waste your time with men who aren't.

Dear Jasbina, 

What can women do about the "intimidation" factor? When men learn I am highly educated and successful, they often get intimidated. It doesn't make for a successful dating life. It's also so disheartening, especially because I've worked so hard to achieve these goals.


Dear Successful, 

I'm sorry to hear that you're feeling disheartened. That won't be of any help in the dating process. I think it's time for a mindset shift. I'd like you to consider your educational and professional accomplishments as assets, as opposed to liabilities, in your dating efforts. To help you get there, I'd like to share statistics that you (and other highly accomplished female readers) will find reassuring.

Nearly half of all single women believe their professional success is intimidating to the men they meet. However, a 2005 article in the American Journal of Sociology, based on a study of interpersonal relationships in 60 communities nationwide, concludes that women in positions of power are sexier to men than women in less powerful positions.

According to research by Christine Whelan, an Oxford-educated scholar of social history and author of Marry Smart: The Intelligent Woman’s Guide to True Love

  • 71% of high-achieving men said a woman's educational or career success makes her more desirable as a wife.
  • 92% of men who describe themselves as either "very successful" or "successful" said that they are more attracted to women who are successful in their own careers.
  • 89% of high-achieving men said they'd like to marry, or have already married, a woman who is as or more intelligent than they are.
  • 68% of single high-achieving men report that they would like to marry a woman who is as committed to her career as they are to theirs.

Now are some guys turned off or intimidated by successful women? Absolutely! Just don't waste your valuable time with them. The findings above suggest that there are many guys out there who will view your accomplishments favorably.

The good news is that it is a myth that men are generally turned off by successful women. The bad news is that this myth can insidiously become a self-fulfilling prophecy for successful women who believe it to be true. By buying into this myth, some successful women can be their own worst enemies in dating.

So what can accomplished women do? Read my blog post – My Success Intimidates Men. What Do I Do? 8 Tips To Help.

Jasbina Ahluwalia is an Indian American attorney-turned-entrepreneur, relationship expert, radio show host and matchmaker/dating coach. She is the founder and president of Intersections Match by Jasbina, the only premier full-service selective search, dating / relationship coaching & online dating support firm – for Indian singles. Jasbina is also the host of Intersections Talk Radio, a monthly holistic lifestyle show – conversations with published authors/experts on relationships and health and wellness. She has received worldwide press (Oprah, Chicago Tribune, Inc., Entrepreneur Magazine) including TV, video and Radio.

For more information, please visit Feel free to submit a Question to be considered for this column to Jasbina directly at

For more from Jasbina:

This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission.

More dating tips from YourTango:

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Jasbina Ahluwalia

Relationship Coach

Jasbina Ahluwalia
Founder & President

Intersections Match by Jasbina
Join our Radio Show
Add me on facebook 
Add me on LinkedIn
Follow us on Twitter

To be Considered as a Potential Match for Jasbina's Selective Clients: Create Free Account here.

Relationship Q&A Videos:  Jasbina has numerous Relationship Q&A Videos.

More from Jasbina - Read Her Blog

Listen in every 3rd Monday at 6:00 PM Eastern as Jasbina Ahluwalia Founder of Intersections Match Hosts a monthly show featuring Experts on trending topics on NetIP.

Location: San Francisco - Bay Area, CA
Credentials: JD, MA
Other Articles/News by Jasbina Ahluwalia:

Love Yourself: The Key to Coupleness


Jasbina Ahluwalia asks Dr. Jan Yager – Author of the book 125 Ways to Meet the Love of Your Life: Defining your own roles is important. In terms of compatibility, I think it’s important to be comfortable as a couple to let yourself define roles instead of taking on societal roles in terms of whether you’re supposed to have ... Read more

Childhood Effects Love


Jasbina Ahluwalia asks David Wygant – Author of the book Naked:  You’re making the realization so that you can allow it to pass over you. You’re not terribly concerned with not getting a response to a particular email. While I enjoyed reading your entire book, my favorite chapter was the one entitled Live Your Rule Book.  I ... Read more

Proactive Online Dating Tips


Jasbina Ahluwalia asks David Wygant – Author of the book Naked:  I love that. It’s a mindset. You see this opportunity. Get off the sidelines and see these as opportunities. Make your opportunities by applying this commitment. One of the many avenues of meeting people is online dating. You do mention online dating in your book. You ... Read more

See More

My Videos
Most Popular