Divorce Without Reason

By

Divorce Without Reason
Should I Hold On?

Question: I've been married for almost seven years. My husband was born in India and came to the United States when he was 18 years old. I was born here. The two of us met while in college, fell in love and then married. We don’t have kids. Now my husband wants a divorce. When I ask him for a reason, he just says we have nothing in common.

I believe that my husband is dealing with  other unrelated issues and unfairly taking it out on our marriage. We're currently separated. When do I know that it’s time to let him go? Should I hold on and hope that my husband will eventually come around?

 

Answer: I'm sorry to hear this and I appreciate your thoughtful question. Have you considered working with a marriage and family therapist during this period of separation? If you both are willing to participate in counseling, I would strongly encourage you to do so.You are certainly not alone. Marital counseling should provide an environment where both you and your husband have the opportunity to openly share your thoughts and feelings with each other.

With the assistance of the trained therapist, perhaps you both will be able to work through the issues you are experiencing. Many marriages go through periods of difficulty and emerge  stronger and happier than before. If he is not willing to participate in counseling at all, he may have already concluded that he is no longer interested in continuing the relationship.

In my opinion, once either partner is clearly no longer interested in continuing the relationship, the other partner should honor him or herself by accepting the decision.Whether your husband's reason for making this decision is that he believes that the two of you have nothing in common or that he may be having issues apart from your marriage, my suggestion to you would be: prioritize your own well-being.

If your husband is not willing to continue working on your relationship, try your best not to spend your energy and time on why he has made his decision or what may be responsible for his decision. This is easier said than done, especially given the many of us tend to crave closure, but it is worth the considerable effort required to let go.

I encourage you, instead, to focus your time and energy on self-healing, including tapping into the energies of your support system. Best wishes to you during this challenging time.

Jasbina Ahluwalia  is an Indian American Attorney-turned-Entrepreneur, Relationship Expert, Radio Show Host and Matchmaker/Dating Coach. She is the Founder & President of Intersections Match by Jasbina, the only Premier Full-Service Selective Search, Dating / Relationship Coaching  & Online Dating Support Firm – For Indian Singles. Jasbina is also the host of Intersections Talk Radio, a monthly holistic lifestyle show – conversations with published authors/experts on relationships and health and wellness.

She has received worldwide press (Oprah, Chicago Tribune, Inc., Entrepreneur Magazine) including TV and Video & Radio. For more information, please visit www.IntersectionsMatch.com. Feel free to submit a Question to be considered for this column to Jasbina directly at info @ interectionsmatch.com

For more from Jasbina:

This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission.

More relationships advice on YourTango:

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Jasbina Ahluwalia

Relationship Coach

Jasbina Ahluwalia
Founder & President

Intersections Match by Jasbina
Join our Radio Show
Add me on facebook 
Add me on LinkedIn
Follow us on Twitter
 

To be Considered as a Potential Match for Jasbina's Selective Clients: Create Free Account here.

Relationship Q&A Videos:  Jasbina has numerous Relationship Q&A Videos.

More from Jasbina - Read Her Blog

Listen in every 3rd Monday at 6:00 PM Eastern as Jasbina Ahluwalia Founder of Intersections Match Hosts a monthly show featuring Experts on trending topics on NetIP.
 

Location: San Francisco - Bay Area, CA
Credentials: JD, MA
Other Articles/News by Jasbina Ahluwalia:

South Asian Marriage: 8 Tips to Prevent Divorce

By

Divorce is a life-altering and potentially traumatic event. For most couples who get divorced, significant time, energy and heartache were spent before coming to the decision of getting divorced. Most South Asian countries have some of the lowest divorce rates in the world. As men and women are becoming more equal and are becoming aware of the signs of ... Read more

What Do Men REALLY Want? Find Out!

By

"When you look at the modern world of dating, what changes do you envision in the future?" This was a question I asked in an interview I had with Susan Winter, the author of the book Allowing Magnificence: Living the Expanded Version of Your Life. Susan Winter's Response: "You're going to like this. As a futurist, the ... Read more

6 Reasons To Trust Yourself (Not Your Friends) Looking For Love

By

Jasbina: In this interview, I ask Susan Winter (author of the book Allowing Magnificence: Living the Expanded Version of Your Life: Speaking of recalibration and no mistakes, what are the biggest pitfalls that a woman could make today in trying to find love? This is given all the challenges that you mentioned. Susan Winter: I'm going to say something ... Read more

See More

 
My Videos
ASK YOURTANGO MORE QUESTIONS
Must-see Videos
SEE MORE VIDEOS
Most Popular