Challenge #9: Explore your deepest desires — outside of the bedroom.
SO HOW DO YOU KEEP PUBLIC NOOKIE SAFE YET SEXY?
By Melanie Gorman
The fantasy of sex in public is one that everyone seems to have some variation on. From being caught up in the moment and losing yourself in the passion, to trying to orgasm when someone else is watching ... having sex in public is certainly something that lots of people think about. What they don't always consider are the consequences. Know what you want is a part of creating a great sex life, but being smart about how you play those fantasies out can mean the difference between something that happens only once in your lifetime and something that you can create again and again. And you can certainly create a risky sexual interlude that's a bit safer with a few precautions:
1. Never put yourself or your lover in harm's way. Risky sex can be incredibly exciting, but if there's a chance of getting hurt or having some unforgivable consequence if you're caught, it's best to let that scenario go. Stay away from risky locations or anything that puts you or your lover in the crosshairs of some life-altering circumstances (so having sex on your boss' desk should be out).
2. Know who might walk in and caught you ... and when. If you're going to have sex at your parents' house, your office or somewhere else risky, consider who might be walking in and when you have the least chance of being caught. Of course, the allure of being caught is half of the excitement, so a little planning can keep you on the edge but not in hot water. Think about the scene in the first season of Mad Men when Peggy Olsen and Pete Campbell have sex on the couch in his office. Their timing is impeccable and it happens just before everyone arrives for work in the morning. Because of the risk of getting caught, the whole event seems to take mere seconds. This keeps the passion flowing and hardly anyone notices the tear in her dress during the rest of the day.
3. Be clear about how much of a voyeur you really are. Sex in an elevator is always risky because you don't know where those hidden cameras are. But if you're OK being seen by the nightwatchman, consider who else might be trying to get on the elevator. There's less traffic at night, midday and early morning; although, don't forget that lots of people leave for work early in the morning! Time of day, day of the week and other variables that account for public traffic in your little love nest can make a huge difference for being caught.
4. Make it a quickie. Playing out fantasies like this should be fast. Easy access clothing makes a huge difference for how cumbersome the whole event is and you want to be prepared if you need to make a quick get-away or stop in the middle. Take a few extra minutes to plan and you're more likely to actually have the fantasy you've been dreaming about.
Everyone, it seems, has some kind of risky sex fantasy in their minds. Playing them out can be incredibly fun and creates memories that last a lifetime and enhance your regular sexual play. Just remember that being charged with public lewdness or indecent exposure (depending on your state) can stay with you for a lifetime, so play it safe when you're out having fun.