Expert Blog Compelling advice, stories, and thought-provoking perspectives straight from YourTango's lineup of Experts to you

Travel Lightly to Love

Love

Release unhealthy relationship patterns, make peace with your past and travel lightly to love.

A woman tends to put a lot of thought and time into planning her travels (i.e. packing consciously by making a list of things to take, setting clothes out before putting them in her suitcase, arranging items in her suitcase with care, etc.). Whether it’s traveling for business or pleasure, what a woman packs can make her trip more or less enjoyable. With the right clothes, shoes and accessories, she is worry-free from the discomfort of not having the right outfits to wear.

A woman tends to approach love differently. She travels from one relationship to another, carrying old baggage from the past into her next relationship that weighs her and her partner down. If she doesn’t lighten her load, she ends up with a heavy suitcase that she has to check-in, instead of a carry-on.

Check-in vs. Carry-on Luggage

Check-in luggage is heavy, bulky and cumbersome. A woman who travels with a cumbersome suitcase in her love life, packs a heavy heart, unresolved issues, unhealthy thoughts, heartache, skepticism, hurt, etc., — all contributing negatively to her experience of love. If she doesn’t unpack unhealthy relationship patterns and make peace with her past, her suitcase becomes a burden filled with disappointment and dissatisfaction from a cycle of bad dates and expired relationships.

Carry-on luggage is easier to travel with. A woman packs only what she needs in a smaller and lighter suitcase. Because she isn’t traveling with excess baggage, she’s free to enjoy her journey and travel with more ease to her desired destination of love. Lightening your load is the ideal way to travel when it comes to love. Unpack your baggage after bad dates and relationships that don’t work out.

How Much Baggage are You Carrying?

The more experiences you have when love hasn’t worked out, the greater the possibility that you’re packing excess baggage. How do you know if you’re carrying too much baggage? If you answer “yes” to any of these questions, your opportunity is to remove the extra stuff that’s weighing you down.

  1. Are you losing hope?
  2. Is your heart heavy?
  3. Are you jaded and skeptical?
  4. Do you still blame yourself or your partner for your failed relationship?
  5. Are you still pining for your ex?
  6. Are your habitual thoughts about love unhealthy and not supportive?
  7. Are you afraid to put yourself out there because of past love not working out?
  8. Do you think all the good men are taken?
  9. Are you stuck in the past and unable to move forward?
  10. Do you have unresolved relationship issues?
  11. Are you unable to forgive yourself or your partner for something that happened in the past?
  12. Are you continually having the same relationship with different men?
  13. Are you judgmental about your partner and/or yourself?
  14. Do you get upset because you take things personally in your relationship?
  15. Do your partner’s words, behaviors or actions trigger a negative response from you?

Related Article: How to Remove Your Barriers to Love

Traveling with a light heart is an ongoing process. It’s taken me years to unpack my excess baggage and while I travel lightly, at times, #I4 and #15 find themselves in my suitcase. This gives me the opportunity to remove these unnecessary items from my suitcase.

Lighten Your Load

If you’re dissatisfied with your love life, be conscientious about unpacking excess baggage. The more excess baggage you remove, the more you heal yourself so that you’re able to approach love with a lighter heart. Even if you’re in a good relationship, there’s always room to lighten your load.

Imagine the freedom and ease of traveling with a light heart. You can definitely travel lightly by removing self sabotaging behaviors and actions, resolving unresolved issues, unhealthy relationship patterns, heartache from relationships not working out and negative thoughts. What will you unpack?

Once you remove your excess baggage, replace your carry on with self love, self worth, clarity, hope, faith, feminine energy, judgment-free awareness and healthy thoughts. May you pack lightly and travel to love with a light heart.

Having a hard time finding success in love?  Take the Love Indicator Assessment. You'll receive a free 6-page report showing where you're at with love, the reasons you haven't found it yet and what you can do to immediately improve your love life.

This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission from the author.

Explore YourTango