Hate Making Decisions? 4 Tricks To Try
By Janet Ong Zimmerman. Posted on .
Oh, the dilemma of indecision. Many successful career women are confident making decisions at work and indecisive when it comes to making decisions about their love lives.
If you've succeeded in your professional life by making logic-based decisions, it's because you've been educated, trained and understand how to do your job proficiently. The opposite is true when it comes to love. Instead of a handbook, manual or training program on how to be successful in love, we learn through the School of Hard Knocks. And, if you're like me, you've gotten mixed results through this trial and error method.
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For decades, I made logic-based decisions without success in love, which led me to second guess myself. But logic-based decisions make you second guess yourself which makes it difficult to feel confident. The less confident you are, the more you question yourself and the more indecisive you are.
Indecisiveness in love shows up in any number of ways, including the following: being consumed by unhealthy thoughts and asking your friends and family what you should do; spending too much time with men and in relationships that aren't right for you; feeling dissatisfied and unhappy; being afriad to make a mistake; second-guessing yourself; and questioning whether you'll ever have true love.
During times in my love life, I've experienced all of the above and more. In fact, my story illustrates the potential repercussions of indecision. You see, when I was 30 to 35 years old, indecision kept me in the wrong relationship. Six months after meeting my boyfriend in Kansas, a job promotion led me back to southern California. I didn't know what to do about our relationship so he decided to move with me. I was happy to be back where my family and good friends were.
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Things between me and my boyfriend became worse over the next four years; he was so unhappy to be in southern California and I was stressed out about his unhappiness. My indecision started out as, 'Should I go out with my friends or stay home with him?'… and grew to 'I can't decide whether to leave or stay in this relationship. I feel guilty if I break up with him because he moved to be with me.' Finally, after waffling for four long years, I broke things off. Keep reading ...
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