Mr. Right Might Be Right In Front of You


Mr. Right Might Be Right In Front of You
Sometimes the perfect guy for you has been right there all along, you just didn't notice.

Buried in between all the unhealthy relationships that never turned out the way I wanted them to, in between all those heartbreaking dramatic episodes with guys that could never give me what I was so looking for, there were a few men who were what I now recognize as really healthy, relationship material kind of guys. But at the time I was just not open to seeing them that way; instead I continued to chase the unhealthy romantic fantasies about love that I had in my head.

To get started on your own personal journey to true love, download Jane's complimentary guide "Find Your True Love: 10 Simple Steps to Getting the Love You Want...and Deserve".


These were genuinely good guys who were looking for an exclusive relationship, weren't afraid of commitment, were honest, were real and didn't play games. Guys who would talk about real life everyday topics, would call when they said they were going to call, show up and plan ahead for when we would see each other so I felt confident that I was a priority, and basically treated me the way I actually wanted to be treated. But because they weren't igniting my own unhealthy chemistry indicator, or maybe because they weren't going full tilt on the romantic pursuit that made me feel so desirable and worthy, they never stood a chance.

Of course, all of them got married and started families not too long after I gave them the "it's not you, it’s me" speech, while I remained single still holding out for the one who existed only in my unhealthy fantasies. The kind of guy I considered my type.

I'll never forget the guy I found too boring (read: he was emotionally stable, financially secure and genuinely a real nice guy), but it was so even-keeled a relationship (read: healthy) that it didn't do anything for me – and so I left for California telling him there was nothing here for me. And I still didn't get it when he asked "What about me?"  I simply refused to believe it could be love if there wasn't an extreme rollercoaster feel to it.

But what if I had known then what I know now? What if I had been looking for a real person to have a real relationship with instead of someone based on the unfinished business of my childhood? How much time, energy and heartbreak could I have saved myself if I had figured this out early on? Of course, I was fortunate to have finally realized that what I thought was my type was actually not going to get me to the kind of relationship that I knew I really wanted.

And you can too.

This article was originally published at Getting to True Love . Reprinted with permission.
Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Jane Garapick

Dating Coach

Jane Garapick knows firsthand what it’s like to have a broken heart, a broken dream, and a broken you. She writes about adventures on the rocky road to finding Mr. Right at her website

To get started on your own personal journey to true love, download Jane's complimentary guide "Find Your True Love: 10 Simple Steps to Getting the Love You Want...and Deserve"

You can also follow her on Twitter @JaneGarapick and "like" her page on Facebook

Location: Bellingham, WA
Credentials: Other
Other Articles/News by Jane Garapick:

Want To Smile More? Say "I Do" To Your Life Right Now.


Human beings are social creatures, and we're wired to feel more secure when we're part of a group. There's no better way to feel this security than by being in a long-term relationship. So while we can recognize on a purely conscious level that we don't need a committed partner in order to be happy, the truth is that a desire for long term ... Read more

He Said, She Said: How Do I Get My Partner To Open Up?

By ,

Want to get your partner to open up to you emotionally so you can deepen your bond and enhance your intimacy? Some words and phrases can push your partner away, while others can bring you closer together as a couple. Men and women, having some major communication differences, tend to respond to different words and phrases. "She said," from Jane ... Read more

Ladies, Your Career Is Ruining Your Love Life


Are you a smart, attractive and successful career woman, but find yourself frustrated that you can't get many dates? And those that you do get don't seem to turn into second or third dates, much less a ring on your finger? Well, you're not alone and new research suggests that it's not your fault you're eating your meals alone in front of ... Read more

See More

Latest Expert Videos
Must-see Videos
Most Popular