It may feel good to hang on to hope, but the reality is that the sooner you can move on, the better
It's holding you back
It's never easy to let go of a dream, but the bottom line is that pining for your past relationship is what keeps you from making progress in life right now, and it's what's keeping you from moving toward the relationship that you really want; the right relationship for you, a healthy relationship.
If you continue to hold on to the belief that the two of you are going to get back together, then you will not get to the grieving stage, which is such a necessary part of moving forward. You need to realize, right now, that you are not going to get back together, and make it your choice. You need to remember the reasons the two of you are not together – even if you feel like it was your fault – say, you were too clingy, or paranoid, or jealous. Well, there were probably things that made you feel that way, and the truth is that in order to be in a healthy relationship you need a combination of time to work on yourself, and get to the root of why you are feeling these unhealthy feelings, and also you need to be with a guy who will treat you in a way that you don't need to feel those feelings.
Finally breaking free of the chains that holding onto your ex puts you in, separating from your ex allows you to truly explore your true self and allows you to connect to that beautiful woman you truly are without the danger of trying to be something you’re not just to please him.
You can finally release the negative feelings about your ex, and replace those with positive feelings about yourself and your life. If you just stop thinking about him eventually those negative feelings that are eating at you will disappear and you'll be ready to allow new love into your life.
Know that these feelings that you felt with him were yours, and you haven't lost the ability to feel those feelings. He didn't cause you to feel them; you felt them because you have the capacity to feel that kind of love. Which means you can feel it again.
Instead of letting your heart get hardened, use this experience to propel you forward towards an even better relationship. You deserve nothing less than this!
Jane Garapick knows firsthand what it's like to have a broken heart, a broken dream and a broken you. She writes about adventures on the rocky road to finding Mr. Right at www.gettingtotruelove.com.
To get started on your own personal journey to true love, download Jane's complimentary guide "Find Your True Love: 10 Simple Steps to Getting the Love You Want...and Deserve".
This article was originally published at Getting to True Love . Reprinted with permission from the author.