It's just dating.
What I finally learned is that the key to dating successfully is to enjoy the process. Just go out with guys and enjoy getting to know them, without all of this crazy pressure to decide if he's the one or not. Don't worry about it! If he doesn't seem like your type, but he asked you out, just go out with him three or four times and get to know him. What can it hurt? The worst thing that can happen is you get to know someone a little better.
I wish I had dated this way earlier; it would have taken all the pressure off – of both of us. It would have kept everything in balance. Instead of the physical, emotional, and mental side of dating, there would have just been one side – the fun side. Without all the other stuff that made it so complicated and made me so anxious, waiting for the phone to ring, waiting for that all-important next step (where is this relationship going?) when it wasn’t even a relationship to begin with. It would have just been about two people spending some time together, getting to know each other a little better. Living. Going out. Experiencing. Enjoying. Having fun.
So if someone wants to set you up with their brother-in-law, or that awkward guy from accounting asks you out, or you get sent a wink from a guy whose profile isn't one that would have caught your eye, just go out with him anyway. And have some fun.
The same thing goes if your dream guy is coming over to pick you up for a romantic dinner. Stop panicking about making sure everything is perfect, and just have some fun. Don't worry if it will turn into anything serious.
It just might, but until it does, just enjoy the ride and don't take it so seriously.
What do you think? Do you think it's OK to go out with a guy if you're not feeling it yet? Tell us about it in the comments!
Jane Garapick knows firsthand what it's like to have a broken heart, a broken dream and a broken you. She writes about adventures on the rocky road to finding Mr. Right at www.gettingtotruelove.com. To get started on your own personal journey to true love, download Jane's complimentary guide "Find Your True Love: 10 Simple Steps to Getting the Love You Want...and Deserve"