Now, of course, if you do like these things, than by all means get out there and meet these guys! Just make sure that you’re being true to yourself, and not just talking yourself into being interested in it in order to meet a guy. If you’re only going to these places because your odds of meeting a single guy is higher, then it’s not going to be the best place for you to meet your future husband. The one who’s going to be compatible with you. Because if you do meet a guy there, he’s going to be pretty interested in what he’s going there for. And if you’re not that interested in it, then you’re going to have a very long rest of your life trying hard to be interested in it.
Another important point to make here is that if you meet a guy in a relatively random place, say the supermarket, what are the chances that he’ll be interested in what you’re interested in? You’re asking for quite a bit of luck to rely on a chance meeting in a random place to result in finding your dream man.
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So what do we do?
Like I said, any of these places can be a good place to meet your guy, the key is to go to places that you’d go to anyway, even if there was no chance of meeting your special guy there. Places that are interesting to you, somewhere that you can develop your passions, enrich your life.
So if you’re into art, then head down to the local art community and see what kind of events are coming up. If you’re into hiking, join the local hiking club and start attending the meetings. If you always wanted to learn how to Tango, then take a Tango class. Acting? Take an acting or improvisation class. If you love helping out others, check out the local community outreach programs.
Don’t worry about whether or not you’ll meet anyone while doing these things. If you’re doing what you want to do, and you don’t come any closer to meeting the man of your dreams, so what? You’re still having a great time doing what you enjoy, and you’re spending time following your own interests, your own passions, your own heart. And by doing that you’re building your own life. Because it's only when we have our own lives that we are able to have a healthy relationship with someone else.
Are you getting what I’m trying to say here? It’s fine to be going where the single guys are, but make sure you’re going to places that you’re interested in going to, too. Because those are the places where you’ll meet someone who shares your interests and values. Regardless of how much the numbers might be in your favor hanging out at the stereotypical guy places, what you really care about is finding the guy who’s right for you, not just a single guy.
And chances are your guy will be somewhere that you’d really like to be, too.
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Jane Garapick knows firsthand what it's like to have a broken heart, a broken dream and a broken you. She writes about adventures on the rocky road to finding Mr. Right at www.gettingtotruelove.com. To get started on your own personal journey to true love, download Jane's complimentary guide "Find Your True Love: 10 Simple Steps to Getting the Love You Want ... and Deserve"