Smart Successful Women: Do I Have To Dummy Down To Get A Guy?


Smart Successful Women: Do I Have To Dummy Down To Get A Guy?
If you've ever asked this question there better be a good answer.

Women are naturally emotionally intelligent, and men are attracted to their opposite. This means women who can feel and express their feelings usually attract men who cannot. It's the difference between the head and the heart; men want what they don't have.

Men can sense intuitively when a woman is in her head, and men don't trust it because conversations about opinions isn't masculine. They are mini sparring matches, and men don't find fighting with women attractive.


Really smart successful women know how to direct the conversation away from conflict and into the realm of feelings. Men are not looking to complicate their lives. They want the pleasure of a woman guiding them out of their heads and into to their bodies, their natures.

They know intuitively that they thrive when they give materially, protect physically and cherish emotionally. This is their joy, their participation in a relationship.

Women you can control your sex life, not your love life. You can control who you have sex, however. Sex alone will not have him fall in love with you. Love has to be his idea. He has to understand you. 

While men won't turn down a free meal, (meaning free sex) but they have a deeper hunger to satisfy. They want to think they have won you over. Men fall in love when they compete, when they conquer and most importantly, when they give.

Have you ever heard someone sing a song where they know all the words, but there's no feeling? Men have feeling radar they listen to hear if there is music to what you are saying, if the can feel you. If they can feel your emotion, they feel safe with you because your emotions are your truth. Just like a song it's about the tone. Can he feel you?

Men speak head to heart; women speak heart to head. The farthest distance for women who has been trained to be a smart successful women is to travel the distance of moving out of their head and back to their heart. When the words match the music a man can hear you, he can feel you and ultimately fall in love with you.This is the gateway to intimacy, and in the end isn't that what we're all after?

A Life of Love is great for understanding men and love.

For More Sex Advice From YourTango:

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

James Allen Hanrahan

Relationship Coach

I work with professional alpha women and the men who love them. Smart, successful people with an on going war between their head and their heart which makes it difficult to have lasting, loving relationships. Welcome.

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Thank you James!
I just went out with a guy who is just the way you described it (feminine energy man), and was such a turn off! He started as a ten and as you mentioned, he did not give me any material, nor protected me (he actually crashed his bike against mine and I fell off the ground), and he cares about his feelings, not mine. So even though he seems like an amazing guy (in so many other areas), all these things put together were such a turnoff! And he keeps himself poor! Jees...Thank you for putting it in such a clean cut way!

 Do you give too much?  Do you have trouble receiving? When you understand what to say and how to say it to a man you will attract and keep the man you want to be with for the rest of your life. Having been alone for many years I know how painful and frustrating it can be not to know why or what to do or say. 

However as a result of what I want to share with you I'm now happily married. It's been a long journey and I want the same for you because in the end love is all that matters. It's possible and you deserve to be loved for who you are inside. Contact me and find your way back to love from the "Inside out Outside in"..

Much love,




Location: Santa Monica, CA
Credentials: Other
Specialties: Dating/Being Single Support
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