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How To Kiss

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How To Kiss
Five Horrible Kisses

A kiss is one of the most intimate things you can do. Many men have won many ladies with a good kiss. Even Disney knows you can live happily-ever-after, if the right man kisses the right woman in just the right way.

Many men (and some women) view kissing as a prelude to sex, rather than the ushering of deeper connection, be it emotional, spiritual, or sexual. Humans instinctively know kissing is intimate,that’s why almost every romantic movie culminates and consummates with one amazing kiss.

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Even as a teenager, how many of us spent time practicing our first kiss, on pillows or dolls? Some of us even enlisted our teenage friends to help us in this endeavor as a practice partner or instructor. Yet, when it comes to relationships, kissing isn’t something we see in our day-to-day lives all that often and yet it can be one of the most powerful ways to convey emotion to our lovers. Think about it, what will have you think about your lover more; that perfunctory peck, OR a lasting, lingering, luscious kiss.

Maybe the problem isn’t so much that we don’t want to kiss it’s that we don’t know how. I can’t tell you how many women confess their longing for a man that knows how to kiss, how to ignite the passion in her. Kisses call forth a wealth of emotion. Whether it’s the right kiss or the wrong kiss - both are equally powerful but in very different ways.

The wrong kiss has the particular flavor of disappointment, sometimes even annoyance, resentment, and anger. Every woman (and man too) wants a kiss to go right. And yet, so  many kisses just go horribly wrong! And for women, nothing destroys the possibility of happily-ever-after faster that a bad kiss! Hell, in some cases it destroys the possibility of great “hook-up”, especially since its incredibly hard to make a come back after a bad kiss.

So in an effort to help our men out, I’ve listed the top 5 worst types of kisses a woman can receive – in my humble opinion. And since kisses allow women to experience a wealth of emotion, which can lead you to the promise land or the fifth circle of hell as a man, I’ve also noted the emotions and thoughts to really drive home the point.

 

The Sloppy Kisser – This guy engulfs your entire mouth with his. His kisses are juicy. His tongue sweeps around the entire rim of your mouth, under your nose, your cheeks, and your chin. If his tongue makes it inside your mouth it’s loaded with saliva. All the while he cups your head trying to force your face more deeply into his mouth.

Dominant emotion: Disgust

Followed by: ExtremeTurn Off

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Thought: “Eeewww” . . . followed by,“Can I have a tissue?”


The Dry Kisser –His kisses are tight lipped. His lips will be slightly chapped, and very little moisture is present during the kiss. He may or may not use his tongue. If he doesn’t use his tongue, you may feel darting against your lips as if he’s undecided or worse, thinks this is what French kissing is all about.  It's remenicent of 7th grade.  He will hold you tentatively about the shoulders, and you won’t be sure if he’s pushing you away or trying to hold you, but his grip will be tight.


Dominant emotion: Irritation

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