As a single-mom, we often get so caught up in playing mommy (and for some of us daddy too) that we don’t take time to see ourselves as anything other than a mom. We are very in touch with the nurturing, maternal side of our femininity, but not the womanly, sensual, sexy side of our femininity. Part of being an empowered woman, an irresistible woman, a sexy woman is taking the time to acknowledge your femininity outside of motherhood.
It’s hard for us to be the provider, the cook, the maid, the secretary, the chauffer, the soccer-mom, and the mommy who kisses boo-boos all in one day; for some of us all in one hour! It can get crazy sometimes – Ask me how I know this?! And then, turn around and be the vixen, the goddess, the fem-fatal, who looks like Venus, and seduces men with just one glance. And in all honesty, who are we kidding, most women are just too tired to even think about any of that. Even women I know who are married, say their favorite activity when they do not have their children, is sleep—and by "sleep" they do not mean "sex with their husbands." They mean sleep, for hours at a time, with nobinterruption and no one to tell them when they have to wake up!
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The first thing is acknowledge that you want it and on some level we actually need it. Dr. Phil once stated that children are meant to leave us. They grow up and move on. We are responsible for their total care when they are first born, and then they gradually begin to care for themselves as they grow older. If we've done our jobs well, this is a seemless transition for the child and for ourselves. We've given enough attention to their care and development and stayed in harmony with our own needs and wants as our children grow.
There are some women who have no identity, no sense of femininity, no life, without their children. This can create issues in your relationships with your children, including being over-protective, needy, non-supportive, co-dependency, and in severe cases create resentment in the relationships.
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It is really great for a mommy to show herself as a mother and a woman to her children. It’s healthy. It generates balance in the relationships and provides positive role models as well. That said, I am not suggesting you "get your sexy on" in front of your children. I am suggesting you get in touch with it as it allows for greater access to your femininity and when you are ready to be in that space for yourself, on a date, or a partner, or with your girls; it won't feel foreign, awkward or like an out of body experience. So many single moms just don’t date or make poor dating choices because they are cut off from that part of themselves that is in touch with our ancient wisdom; that part of them that has guided women for centuries with respect to their femininity, and their choices concerning dating and mating. Keep Reading...
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