2- I won’t be broke. “Hey if we combine our income, resources, we’ll both get a head.” Right? Wrong!! If you marry someone with bad spending habits before you get married, they’ll just continue their spending with your money. Money is always among the top 5 reasons people get divorced. If you are getting married to improve your financial situation, you will probably get divorced for the same reason. #canyousayprenup
3- All my friends are married, and I’m tired of being a 5th wheel. I’d rather be a happy 5th wheel than a part of a miserable broken down wagon. Marriage is work. Anyone who tells you differently hasn’t ever been married. I knew a woman who said one of the most compelling reasons she got married was because everyone else made it seem so great. All the women in her life made their marriages seem like heaven on earth. Her marriage has been 5 years of living hell and she’s still not sure they are going to make it. It’s like your mama said, “If all your friends jumped off a cliff would you?” #fifthwheelsoftheworldunite
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4- I want to have kids. This one I can understand because being a single parent can suck (ask me how I know this?). At the same time, my daughter, myself, and her father are much healthier, loving people than we would have been if he and I stayed married just for her. And he and I have a really great relationship which would not have been possible had we stayed in the relationship. Ultimately if you are a healthy well-adjusted human being, then your children will be too. And while statistically children are more successful when they come from dual parent families, children reared by healthy, happy, single parents are far more successful than children raised in a household filled with neglect, suppression, anger, bitterness, and resentment from parents who just want out and can’t leave until junior is 18. #I’mtrappedundersomethingheavy
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5- Even though we aren’t right for each other I love him/her and our love will make it work. This one is probably the most common one. People don’t get married planning their divorce. The genuinely believe love is enough. And I believe if it’s a mature love, it can be. Real love can overcome almost anything. But these days everyone is hoping for some kind of fairy tale love which is ok as long as it’s Shrek and Fiona love, not Cinderella love. Shrek and Fiona have problems. They have to make adjustments. They aren’t always “happy.” They are worried, angry, scared, irritated and confused, just like in real life. Cinderella just rides off with the prince and we never know the end of the story. Did they stay together, does it work out? You don’t know. What they tell us is “and they lived happily ever after.” Come on! They were married!! Is that actually possible? #Idon’tbelieveinfairytales