Know the signs!
Are you in a relationship and feel a devastated sense of self-esteem, self-worth, and self-confidence? Do you feel like you’re losing your sense of self, forgetting who you are, that you're constantly compromising your integrity and giving up what you really want out of life? Do you also have trouble remembering things or learning new things?
These could all be warning signs that you’re being emotionally abused by a narcissist.
It’s an epidemic affecting countless people around the world. Most of the people affected don’t even know what’s happening. (It’s estimated that one in 11 people in USA has a Cluster B Personality Disorder. With approximately 310 million Americans, how many victims are there in America alone?)
It’s very difficult to see what’s happening when you’re in it, and even from the outside looking in, it’s not so clear unless you know what to look for. The trauma that victims of narcissistic abuse endure lingers long after they leave the situation.
Every day, I hear from victims of narcissistic abuse and I'm astound how similar the behavior is among the covert, aggressive manipulators my clients unfortunately loved. It’s like they've all read the same 'How To Be A Narcissist' handbook! No matter the country, race, culture, language, or socio-economic status they come from, nearly all narcissists follow the same predictable patterns of psychological abuse.
So what are the signs of narcissistic abuse?
A lot of victims and survivors go to therapy because they’re depressed, confused, anxious, and feeling insecure. Often they don’t even know why they feel that way.
Dr. George Simon, the international bestselling author of “In Sheep’s Clothing: Understanding and Dealing With Manipulative People” and psychotherapist with over 30 years clinical experience, noticed that when his patients presented with the psychological symptoms noted above, they were almost always a direct result of a relationship with a covert-aggressive manipulator.
Victims are often unaware what’s happening and are unable to articulate the problem.
If you’re the target of the narcissistic abuse, you likely feel like something is wrong, but can’t quite pinpoint it. You may not even realize how bad the relationship is, especially if you were raised by a narcissist (or other Cluster B personality).
Victims also usually feel a crushing sense of guilt, like it’s all their fault … If only they could give just a little bit more, their partner wouldn't get so upset!
If after reading this you recognize that you are the victim of narcissistic abuse, know that it's not your fault and help is available to help you leave and heal from the situation.
Meredith Miller is a holistic integration coach helping people self-heal and move forward after narcissistic abuse. Check out her free educational videos on YouTube. Learn more about her products and coaching services via Skype at Inner Integration.