Part II: 7 Reasons Why A Man Would Never Know A Woman Is Cheating

The picture of the modern housewife doing five things at once is not uncommon. On the other hand, a man likes to focus on one thing at a time; don’t bother him while he’s trying to fix the car or hooking up the Xbox. Dr. Herb Goldberg states in his book “The New Male Female Relationship,” that this is due to the fact that both hemispheres of the female brain have more connections than the male brain. This makes sense from an evolutionary perspective. Primitive man had to be very single-minded when stalking prey or fending off predators. His female counterpart had to tend to varied tasks like raising the children, keeping the home, gathering nuts and berries and maintaining a strong connection to the tribe. In addition, due to our natural predisposition toward relationship skills, we are better at keeping track of details like what we said to whom or what we did on a particular day. This makes it easier for us to keep track of lies and deception, and to keep them hidden

5. Women are more complex.

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In his book “What Works with Men,” Dr. A. Justin Sterling observes that men are elegantly simple, like a Mack truck. Women are endlessly complex, like a Ferrari. Men stay the same. They figure if it’s not broke, don’t fix it. Women are constantly changing and growing. What makes them happy one day may not work for them another day, which leaves their male partner baffled and left wondering “What do women want?!” Combined with a man’s lack of social sophistication, he is hopelessly clueless that anything out of the ordinary is happening in his marriage, let alone able to accurately ascertain what it is or what to do about it. As Dr. Sterling notes, “It’s like a gorilla doing brain surgery.” Her moods change, her needs change, her sensitivities are so easily touched off by any number of influences. If a woman’s behavior changes or becomes erratic, it’s hard for a man to even notice. It’s par for the course. He can’t tell whether it’s due to her time of the month or a sad movie or a hard day. Her ups and downs are normal. He simply can’t rely on her behavioral cues, like a woman can with a man, to tell if she’s cheating.

6. Men are slaves to their egos.

A man tends to have an over-inflated sense of self. This tunnel vision makes him miss the obvious signs of cheating. According to Dr. Sterling, a man is built for performance. He has to take orders from his ego, which tells him he is the top dog, king of the hill, master of the universe.  As the breadwinner, a man has to go out and compete in the world. Listening to his ego is necessary to help him win. A woman, on the other hand, is able to ignore her ego and listen to the voice of her feminine self, which tells her to yield to her mate’s ego and  support the needs of the relationship. In this light, it would be hard for a man to even conceive that his spouse might be cheating on him, since his ego is constantly feeding his fantasies of how invincible and superior he is to all other men. Even if he were to notice any signs of infidelity, he would be inclined to ignore or disbelieve them.

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7. Men are more independent.