Why Trump's 'P***y Grab' Has NOTHING To Do With 50 Shades Of Grey

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Trump's Pussy Grab Comment Has Nothing To Do With 50 Shades
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Sorry, Joe Walsh, but this is pure malarkey.

50 Shades Of Grey is back in the news again, but not for logical reasons.

Recently, Republican Congressman Joe Walsh tweeted his opinion that women who liked the fictional novel Fifty Shades of Grey have no right to criticize Trump, and should grow up.

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Fifty Shades author, EL James, responded by saying, "The word "pussy" does not appear in Fifty Shades of Grey. And it's fiction. You know. FICTION. #LearnTheDifference and #GrowUp."

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It turns out Walsh isn't alone in his misguided thinking, as journalist Scottie Nell Hughes, a Trump surrogate, also compared Trump’s comments to the Fifty Shades trilogy when speaking with reporter Anderson Cooper and political commentator Ana Navarro, saying, "Unfortunately, we have made that to be sort of a part of the culture, a 'Fifty Shades of Grey' culture in today's society that men can talk like that."

Those who have not read the Fifty Shades trilogy may be making the erroneous presumption that it is filled with vulgar, sexualized language with scenarios involving a woman who is dominated by an “alpha male” type of guy.

It is not.

The storyline is actually about a female heroine named Anastasia Steele, who, in fact, dominates and ultimately helps her male lover, Christian Grey.

This happens in the same way the heroine in the Twilight series dominates and helps hers. In fact, the Fifty Shades series originated from fan fiction based on the Twilight series, so the theme involving a female heroine is purposely similar.

In the novel, Christian uses BDSM role-play within his sexual relationships as a way to cope with suppressed emotions from his childhood abuse and abandonment issues. He is seen as an emotionally weak male — until he is “saved” by the heroine, Anastasia. In reality, BDSM "players" have been shown to be as (or more) emotionally healthy than the general population.

It is also crucial to note that even in this fictional story, Christian, exercises great care to always first get permission from his lover, to treat her with respect, and to ensure upfront and ongoing communication about expectations, concerns and consent BEFORE anything takes place — as any respectable Dominant would do.

Anastasia holds the power of her “safe word,” and remains in complete control regarding how far things can be taken at all times.

Additionally, Christian never uses sexual words in derogatory ways — certainly, a lesson that is needed in our real-life society that still struggles with an ongoing rape culture fueled by such language.

Bottom line, Fifty Shades Of Grey is not a fictional rape fantasy. 

Comparing the Fifty Shades trilogy to descriptions of real-life sexual assault, such as grabbing a woman by her genitals without her consent, is simply an argument made by people who are ignorant about the actual storyline of the Fifty Shades trilogy, as well the true nature of BDSM.

More importantly, comparing a fictional story to descriptions of real life sexual assault is illogical and irrational, to say the least.

Strong men don’t put women down in order to be powerful  they lift them up, as Christian does for Anastasia.

Furthermore, bragging about grabbing a woman by her genitals without her consent is NOT normal “locker room” banter. These are the things sexual predators say in order to rationalize their own abusive behavior.

Such comments are cruel, frightening and hurtful to women. Truly strong and powerful men understand this, and protect women from such abuse  just as Christian did when Anastasia was being sexually harassed and assaulted by her boss, Jack Hyde.

Only a man who is an emotional weakling lacks the courage to protect, respect and empower women.

While there is no such scientific definition of an “alpha male” in humans, the term is often used to describe a male who is dominating.

It should NOT be used to describe weak men who use it to justify assaulting, abusing and hurting women, because that is not a man who has true power. That is a man who is a bully and coward hiding behind a façade of what it means to be a good man.

Even the fictional character, Christian Grey, who was abandoned and abused as a child, had enough common sense to know that.

Lisa S. Lawless. Ph.D. is the founder and C.E.O. of Holistic Wisdom, Inc. which provides sexual health and wellness education, resources and products. She is also, founder of the National Association for the Advancement of Science & Art in Sexuality (NAASAS) which is an educational organization for sexual health professionals.

 

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