Self

6 Steps On How To Be Happy With Yourself: Don't Hide!

don't hide

It took me a long time to get to the point of accepting myself, of being happy in my own skin and I want to reach out to everyone who is feeling that they can't be authentically who they wish they could be. This is for all who want to know how to be happy with yourself.

For me, feeling different kept me hiding the real me. I was feeling embarrassed and fearful of what people would think. I was trying to be like everyone else. But the problem was I wasn't. I had my own way of wanting to be in the world that didn't fit in with the status quo.

My reluctance to be authentic stemmed from my need to be accepted and not rejected. My lack of self-esteem meant I didn't feel worthy enough to honor me. It was only through working on my self-love that things changed. I know it sounds like a cliché but as soon as I started to accept myself, I worried less about what people thought and more about what was right for me.

The real me doesn't fit into the norm. She believes there's a deeper meaning and purpose to life. She spent years reading books about spiritual development and watching movies like Conversations With God and The Way of The Peaceful Warrior. She genuinely believes in peace and doesn't like what's going in the world. She meditates daily and follows her intuition above what anyone else might say. She also does something that many would deem as nutty, that's called automatic writing, that she kept secret for a long, long time.

Automatic writing is basically an extension of intuition where you write without thinking — sometimes asking a question and then 'receiving' an answer that comes from outside of your mind. From my perspective, it's the solution to solving all our problems.

So here are 6 steps on how to start living as the authentic you, in touch with your intuition, honoring what really makes you tick:

  1. You're not living your life if you're doing what other people want you to do, at the expense of yourself. If you're doing a job because you feel you should be doing it, stop for a moment and think in an ideal world, what would you be doing instead? If nothing springs to mind find a quiet place, grab a pen and paper and write these 2 questions to yourself: In an ideal world what would I be doing? And how would it make me feel? Then write down the first things that come into your mind.
  2. Is there something affecting you emotionally that you're hiding from people close to you? We've all been taught to only show our best side but the truth is we're all carrying around baggage that's holding us back from really being authentically happy. Feelings from painful and hurtful things that happened to us in child or adulthood do not leave us until we start to talk or cry about them! We might be in denial about how we really feel, but it doesn't mean the emotions aren't there and that the hurt isn't still affecting us. Be brave and tell someone close to you something that's happened to you that you haven't spoken about before, that you know deep down you feel sad or angry about. Get it out!
  3. Self-care is something that women especially forget for themselves. We're so busy running about after everyone else that we neglect what we need. Don't feel weak for needing time out — it's essential and too many people aren't honoring their need for it. Think about something you can give yourself time to do each week. It might be as simple as taking a relaxing bubble bath or doing an evening exercise class. Making time for yourself to do what only you want to do is so important to your overall well-being and starting to get in touch with your intuition.
  4. Read books that inspire you. There's so much going on around you that drains your energy — the news and violent TV programs are just a few examples. Start paying attention to what makes you feel good and what makes you feel bad. Anything that you put your attention on that makes you feel anxious or afraid is not good for you. A book that inspires and relaxes you is.
  5. You're a unique individual that can't be stereotyped. Don't let someone assume that because they like it you like it too. Start to think about some of the things that you are currently doing that perhaps you don't really want to do.
  6. Set an intention to get to know yourself better, to go inwards and really feel what you enjoy to do. Sometimes we get so caught up in helping others close to us with their needs and dreams that we forget that ours matter too. 

When you start to follow your intuition, you realize it's leading you to what you really want. And what you really want is never what you should be doing, it's what makes you feel passionate and alive.

"The only real valuable thing is intuition."  Albert Einstein