When we decided to bring the fun back into our relationship, we cooked a whole meal together wearing Groucho Marx glasses. Of course we felt silly — and that was the whole point!
4. Want to spice up your relationship? Ditch all negativity!
Why are we so inclined to focus on what's bad instead of what's good? Every relationship (including ours, once upon a time) contains at least some negativity, and the amount of negativity in a relationship is directly proportional to the amount of trouble it's in. Negativity includes any/all words, tone of voice, facial expressions and/or behavior your partner says feels negative to him/her. And yes, rolling your eyes counts.
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You see, negativity is like rat poison; nothing can grow in it! So, if you want your relationship to grow, you've got to get rid of all negativity. Yes, all of it. We finally did, and in fact, our zero tolerance policy is the single most effective strategy we've used to create real love.
These truths can help you become better partners for each other, and to create a marriage full of real, lasting love and a blissful connection.
Harville Hendrix, Ph.D. and Helen LaKelly Hunt, Ph.D. are bestselling authors and creators of Imago Relationship Therapy, which is practiced by over 2,000 therapists around the world. Partners in life and work, their newest book Making Marriage Simple distills what they have learned into ten essential and provocative truths about marriage.
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