How 'This Means War' Can Help You Find Love

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How 'This Means War' Can Help You Find Love [EXPERT]
Discover secrets of finding love online in the action-adventure-romantic comedy "This Means War"...

I was surprised to find savvy online dating advice in a new action/adventure/comedy/romance This Means War. The film's testosterone driven opening sequence shows two of the world's deadliest CIA operatives chasing and beating the bad guys. In a quiet lull after the carnage, the CIA warriors played by Tom Hardy and Chris Pine, show us their personal side. One is a player with no desire to settle down; the other is a divorced dad looking for real love. They are inseparable partners and best friends, until they discover they've fallen in love with the same woman, played by Reese Witherspoon.

She is a dedicated career woman who's too busy to find a date. Her romantic life gets a jump start after her best friend signs her up for an online dating site. Then she instantly meets an intriguing match, bumps into his best friend and falls for both of them. This scenario is a Hollywood ending to her dating famine and beginning of a dating feast with two exciting men who decide to hide their friendship and their true identity from her. 12 Common Online Dating Mistakes

Protecting your identity is a standard safety precaution in online dating. Typically, you use a screen name, meet in public places and wait to reveal your contact info until you find out if you have any common interests or mutual desire to date.

Reese's character totally enjoys exploring common interests at an amusement park with her down to earth date who's the divorced dad who claims to be a travel agent. She doesn't like the club scene, where her second candidate—who often says he's captain of cruise ship—takes her. When she walks out of the club, he's shocked and forced to imagine, possibly for the first time, what a woman might like to do or want in a man. Since he likes her, he's motivated to find out what she likes and give it to her. Should You "Google" A First Date?

Will this narcissistic player change his dating habits to win her heart, once he discovers what she wants? Both men find out what she wants by using high-tech CIA intelligence. Fortunately, dating singles without CIA resources can gather the same intelligence just by asking the right questions during a date.

Reese's character does ask the right questions on her first dates, yet she misinterprets answers by what she wants to hear instead of what was being said. For example, she asks her date, "Have you ever killed anyone?"

"Not lately," he replies.  She mistakenly views his sarcasm as denial. We recognize this dating mistake, since we've just watched him expertly kill people as part of his CIA assignment. This scene illustrates why single men and women should take a date at their word instead of painting your preferred meaning on what they're telling you. Dating Chemistry Test - #1 Question To Ask A Love Match

So what does Reese's character want? Thanks to two sets of bugs planted in her apartment, her dating candidates catch her admitting to a friend that she wants to casually date both men until she figures out which one is her best love match. This actually is a smart dating strategy, as long as you are honest about it and you keep things platonic while you find out which match makes your heart feel at home. Will Reese follow that savvy strategy or will she succumb to her intense sexual attraction to both men?

This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission from the author.

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