Help: My Son Has Sexy Posters On His Wall!

By GalTime Teen Parenting Expert, Barbara Greenberg, PhD

Dear Dr.G.,

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My husband and I have found a new issue to fight about. Here's the problem. My teenage son who just turned 16 has basically plastered his bedroom walls with posters of scantily-clad women. He buys these with his own money. Believe me, I do NOT give him money for this type of decoration. He goes to the mall with his friends and I suppose they buy these posters there.

I think that these posters are too sexually provocative. The women in these photos are not naked but they might as well be. They are all wearing these teeny weeny bikinis. I also have an 8-year-old set of twins--a boy and a girl, and I am concerned about the effects of these posters on them. Will they start thinking about sex too early? I'm not a psychologist. I really don't know.

My gut tells me to have my son remove these posters. My husband says that I'm being ridiculous and uptight and that I should be thankful that my son is interested in the opposite sex. What do you think, Dr. G.? Rip down the posters or let them stay up? 

A Confused Mother 

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Dear Mother,

It is excellent that you and your husband are discussing your difference of opinion. You should continue to expect that you will have differences of opinion as you raise your kids.

Regarding your son's walls, it is difficult to judge them without seeing them. Nonetheless, I am a believer in balance in most situations. He is after all a teenage boy and, of course, he will enjoy having posters of women in bathing suits.

I would, however, suggest to him that he mix it up a bit with posters of other interests as well. Your husband sees no harm with your son having these posters. There probably is no harm except that you want him to live in an environment that stimulates a variety of senses.

I am not judging you, your husband, or son. I am simply making a recommendation about what will be best for your son, his younger siblings, and for your comfort level as well. Your son does share the house with a family. When he gets to his college dorm room you will, however, no longer have this level of input. At that point, it will be between him and his roommate.

Good luck.
Dr. G.

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