By Rabbi Arnie Singer, founder of Jcoach.com
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The competition in dating is fierce. That's a fact. There are women out there going for the same men as you are, and here's the hard truth -- some are going to be more beautiful than you. In places like NYC and LA, there are loads of these women. If you're one of those beauties, you can probably stop reading this and continue doing whatever's been working for you.
For the rest of you, I'd like to divest you of this problem once and for all. The way to handle competition in dating from ladies you don't think you can compete against is simple: don't compete. Here are 3 tips for getting your man without competing against the unbeatable ones.
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Dealing with Dating Competition
1. Don't Chase Model Chasers
You know the type and you know what they're after, yet you still try to grab their affection. What a waste of your time. So what if they're good looking, successful, and just plain smooth operators? When given the choice between you or that tall blonde creature with the huge eyes (and breasts), they will never choose you. Once you accept that, you'll be able to focus your attention on the men who you can get. These are the men who might not wear the All Star jerseys but can still hit the ball and get on base. They'll make you feel like a million bucks, if you give them the chance. Some of these guys might imagine themselves as model chasers, but the smart ones learn to accept their reality pretty quickly (after being blown off enough times) and focus on women who give them the time of day. That's where you sail in, wind in your hair, and not a model in sight.
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2. Location, Location, Location
Remember that famous lyric from the Crosby, Stills and Nash song, "If you can't be with the one you love, love the one your with?" Well, when you're in a place where there is no competition, you can command lots of attention. Your job is to find those places and use them as your private hunting reserves. If all the beautiful people are heading to the Hamptons, stay in the city and feast on the leftovers. There are plenty of high quality men that don't weekend in the hot spots and prefer to just hang close to home. This is your chance to pounce. Avoid the places where you know the competition is fierce. As a wise rabbi once said, "Better to be the head of a fox than the tail of a lion."
3. Dominate Your Niche
If you were thinking of starting another online dating site, I'd tell you to forget it. You've got no chance against the big players like match.com and eharmony.com, who dominate the field. But if your plan is to start a dating site for underachieving lesbian athletes from Wisconsin with blue eyes and black hair, I'd say you've got a fighting chance of becoming the dominant player in the field.