Help yourself find the one by removing the Blocks in your life.
You know what I’m talking about. These are the Blocks that douse the spark in a relationship before it even gets started!
Maybe you automatically choose the most unavailable guy around. Maybe you’ve given up and feel hopeless about ever finding someone to be your best friend, lover and companion for life. Maybe the big ideas like love, trust and intimacy seem too distant no matter what you do. And you don’t know why!
What I’m going to tell you comes from nearly 20 years as a Repatterning practitioner and Energy Kinesiologist. Not as a counselor or talk therapy guru, but as someone trained to help you uncover the hidden Love Blocks that sabotage your relationships and send the potential Mr. Right running for cover.
Repatterning is a simple system that helps you recognize deeply embedded relationship patterns, aka Love Blocks. The truth is that you’re dealing with a Love Block that has probably been anchored in your unconscious for a long time and, even though you’re no longer aware of its presence or power, it still runs the show.
The good news is Love Blocks can be changed. I’ve helped hundreds of women (men too) bring their relationship dreams to life, so let me take you through the 4 steps of my simple system right now:
STEP ONE: Find out what the real problem is.
You may think the problem is that you’re not good enough, or attractive enough or clever enough. That’s not true and that’s not what keeps your Love Blocks stubbornly in place. In fact, the problem is never what you think it is.
This is worth repeating: In relationships, the problem is never what you think it is.
The real problem is usually an ancient pattern that was formed at birth or within the first 3 years of your life. That’s when you learned how to compensate for a lack of love or TLC. And instead decided that you had to be perfect, or invisible, or have the sharpest tongue in the room.
Only you’ve forgotten that you’re the one who made that choice as a way to cope. You don’t know that with help you can make another choice and stop chasing away the very people who can bring you the warmth you secretly, desperately, crave.
These relationship patterns get even more complicated when they replicate generational patterns. The kind Iyanla Vanzant on her TV show correctly calls “generational pathology.” (Yes, she too has studied Repatterning work so she’s very good at spotting these kinds of embedded relationship Blocks.)
STEP TWO: How to find out what the real problem is.
I can tell you to have a few Repatterning sessions (I use muscle checking to zoom in on core problems) and get quickly to the heart of the patterns that sabotage your love relationships.
I can also suggest you use the power of your intention to get quiet, tune in and feel your feelings. Go back through what you know about yourself and others in your family.
If you notice that the women in your lineage have suffered from under appreciated talents, look for that pattern in your own life. Specifically look for ways you undermine or deprecate yourself. How do you keep yourself small? Invisible? Unseen and unheard and safe from pain? How you don't step up and stand out when you know you have something of value to offer?
That’s the same kind of pattern, generational or not, that keeps you safe and mute when a potential Mr. Right shows up. It has nothing to do with being good enough. It has everything to do with a classic Love Block pattern that sends Mr. Right drifting away. Your silence might keep you safe but makes him think you’re uninterested. This Love Block is the real problem you face.
STEP THREE: Change the energy around the problem.
You know Einstein’s famous quote: “You can’t solve a problem at the level of the problem.” Well, that’s true with Love Blocks too.
You’ve probably been operating at the same level of energy in your relationships for a very long time. It’s time to change that. Once you know what the real problem is, the next step is to change your energy and the energy around your Love Block.
If we were having a session, we’d draw from a choice of several hundred energy modalities that help you change from hiding to confidence, from self-deprecation to pride in your accomplishments and in who you are. These modalities might include intentional free-form movement, making nonsense sounds, shouting and stamping your feet, breathing like a steam engine, and smelling the kinds of fragrances that bypass your linear brain and go directly to your emotional brain where painful memory imprints keep the Love Block in place.
It may sound crazy, but almost anything can be used to change the energy around a Love Block. The secret is to do it with intention. Get clear on what you want to change. Hold that Block in your awareness as you sing or dance or clap your hands or revitalize yourself in a pleasing way. Continue until you feel a shift and the Love Block no longer holds a charge. You may need to do this often! You may need to get some help. What you’ll slowly become aware of is that it has become easier to step up and stand out, to attract the attention of Mr. Right and comfortably hold his attention.
STEP FOUR: Create a new relationship pattern.
Very important. With steps 1 - 3, you create an energy vacuum that needs to be filled ASAP. Whether in a session or doing this on your own, set some goals for the kind of relationship you really want. Intend that these goals now fill the vacuum. Make them positive and proactive. Make them personal for you.
Avoid goals like these (because "want" implies lack and they’re too generic): “I want to meet my Soul Mate. I want more love and money in my life.”
Try goals that help you become ever more authentic, so you appeal to Mr. Right:
“I am comfortable with love, trust and intimacy.” “I am able to feel my emotions and speak honestly about them.” “I am part of a loving community where I speak up and my views and values are honored.”
Notice how these kinds of goals make you feel. They come from a place of authenticity and self-love.
And you know that when you love and honor yourself you’re so much more confident. And so much more attractive to Mr. Right!
LEARN MORE Download this free e-book.
If you’re not certain what kinds of relationship patterns are blocking love in your life, let me tell you about the 3 most common Love Blocks. They’re known as Control, Deprivation and Rejection.
I’ve written a free e-book on the topic called “Hey Goldilocks,” because I call these Love Blocks the “Three Big Bears of Bad Relationships.”
You may unknowingly demonstrate these Blocks in your own life, or you may notice that you attract others who operate with these patterns as their guidelines.
If you wonder why your relationships don’t go the way you would like them to, this book will give you some useful insights. It is one more step to help you reveal hidden Love Blocks and claim your rightful heritage of relationships based in warmth, trust and intimacy. I know you can do it!
Gail Glanville is a 10,000+ hour Certified Practitioner of Resonance Repatterning who writes and blogs frequently about personal and relationship patterns. She gives Repatterning sessions via phone and Skype to clients on 7 continents.
http://www.changebistro.com 401 654 1565