In Love & Hormones: 3 Rules To Live By

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young couple in love
Dopamine is like cocaine. Are you high?

If you are a woman, keep a log for a few months to map out your moods throughout the month. Do you see a pattern emerging? It might feel forced to listen so itntently to your body, but it does become second nature over time.

2. Use your insight. Knowing your body and cycles will inform your choices and decisions. Are you particularly susceptible to romance during certain times of the month? Decide if that is the best time to go on a first date, or if you will be better equipped to enjoy your date in a few days.  

Perhaps you tend to use the after-sex high to get your spouse talking and engaged with you. Knowing this will create space for totally new conversations around your needs and healthier ways of meeting those needs without manipulation. If you find yourself intensely disliking your partner on a regular basis, maybe your body is using a megaphone to let you know its time to dial in. Numbing yourself will only prolong undesireable situations, or prevent you from recreating pleasurable ones.

3. Own your power. There is no shame in being an emotional, sensational, biochemical being. When we are in touch with our bodies, we are also owning our sexuality and our power. Instead of giving in or giving up, we can choose to share our bodies for the pleasure of both people involved, without losing a thing in the process.  

If it doesn't feel good, if it doesn't work, if it's not safe, it is healthy and necessary to state it out loud and expect to be respected for it. Being in your body will also give you a deeper love for yourself, for what your biology is capable of, and deeper insight into what it means to be wonderful.

Francesca is a life coach and author.  Follow her on Twitter @waofrancesca.

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