When kids use bad language, parents shut down. Learn how to use it to improve your relationship
That got your attention, didn't it?
The expression "F-bomb" (you know, the "F" word that we write f*#@ in public) is now an official word in the dictionary. It reminds me of a parent who said how upset she would get when her son "dropped the F-bomb". She'd react in such a strong, negative way --which is understandable. Whatever they were originally discussing was gone, too busy arguing about such a crude and disrespectful way to talk to your mom!
So here's the deal. It is, as always, a gift of an opportunity to talk about it, and explain how your buttons are pushed. This mom figured out that when her son speaks that way, it's all she can hear. Nothing else gets through to her because she can only focus on the bad language and she shuts down. So I suggested that, in a quiet moment, she tell him exactly that. She came up with her own wording to tell him that she's taken aback when she hears it, shuts down, and the language becomes the new issue. Definitely not a good thing for building a relationship between parent and child.
Kids need information. Whether they agree with it or not, information helps them understand, and this is the beginning of settling disputes and solving problems. How long do you want the yelling and hurt feelings to go on? If you don't talk about it, nothing changes. So talk about it and move on.
More Juicy Content From YourTango:
- 10 Tips For Talking About The Tough Stuff
- 8 Modern Dating Rules Every Single Should Know
- 10 Dating Tips I Wish I'd Followed While I Was Single