You may not have the fortitude to really trust that a guy WILL make the effort for them, so you try to manipulate it subtly: ” “Hey, I’ve got tickets to the Dodgers on Sunday. Wanna go?” “Haven’t heard from you in awhile. Is everything okay at work?” The cold, hard truth is that you shouldn’t HAVE to do anything to remind him that you exist. He knows you exist. And if he’s not making every effort for you, there’s really not much to interpret. Sure, you can go back to pursuing feminine men who are apparently too busy/lazy/afraid to say things like “So, what are you doing Saturday?” But where would that leave you? Powerless. Because you don’t know if he’s going out with you because he WANTS you or because he’s just filling time.
When you don’t do anything, you very quickly figure out where you stand with a guy. Of course, there will be some exceptions to this rule. Only you can decide when to apply the rules and when to waive them. But make no mistake: when we’re hungry, we eat. When we’re tired, we sleep. When we’re interested, we call. It ain’t that complex. And if a passive guy is making excuses and claiming to be hurt that you didn’t pursue him, well boo-hoo-hoo for him. He’ll find a woman that’s more man than he is, and you’ll be free to find a man who actually knows that it’s his role to pursue you.