Eric Amaranth's Safe, Safer, and Super-Safe Sex Methods


Eric Amaranth's Safe, Safer, and Super-Safe Sex Methods
Eric Amaranth, sex coach, details what he defines as safe sex, safer, and safest sex.

Super-Safe Sex: This has all of the above measures but does not allow mouth-to-mouth kissing. This eliminates another infection vector of herpes 1 and HPV. Kissing on the neck and body is okay. It also has what I call the 50 yard line rule. I call it that so the men will remember it easily. The 50 yard line, in this case is the imaginary mid point in space between partners. If a hand or set of genitals crosses over that line and approaches the body of the other person, it does so with fresh gloves on or maybe a fresh dental dam or condom, though not always necessary.

When the hands or genitals cross back to your side of the 50 yard line, you take off the gloves. This avoids accidental in-the-moment touching of your own genitals/anus, rubbing eyes, touching your mouth, while the sexual fluids and possibly transmittable HPV/HIV/HSV (insert other STD here) material, which is invisible. Manual sex is safe when you are aware of where your hands are going (to be washed) after you finish the event and you aren't concerned about HSV1 transmission. All sex toys used will have condoms on them if they have been used previously with others, that includes the handle too. Two condoms per toy. Total coverage. however, boiling sex toys for 5 mins does do the job so I'm told. If some part of a toy cannot be submerged, you have to cover it with a condom.


I want to say something about washing up immediately after sex. I've had women tell me that they're bothered by me doing that becase it's like I'm washing off because they're dirty. It's not that. It's to take care of excess semen for her sake and because that's what I do and a rule for safe sex practices. If she doesn't like that, then that's okay, we just won't be having sex again because they aren't interested in following my rules-- just theirs. Some have told me it breaks the intimacy and it may trigger abandonment issues. Once again, I follow my safe sex rules. Everyone here having sex is an adult, not a five year old. I tell them I'll be back to cuddle right after I've followed my rules.

Again, if they don't like that, then it's a no-go and say you had a wonderful time, but you have to get dressed and leave. They can take up abandonment issues with their therapist, not their lovers who won't be gone longer than a five minutes tops to clean up. You can even take partners into the shower with you to not break the mood. If you're that triggered around that issue, then re-evaluate on whether or not you're ready to have partnersex at this point in your life. I'm sure men have their pressure statements too to which you apply the same response. Emotional and mental issues are never an excuse to compromise your rules. I agree to disagree with those who think otherwise.

Another part of super-safe sex rules are disclosure of STI/STD infection status and the last time you were tested. Here's my blog on when to exchange STD test results. It discusses how you can establish an emailable test result page to your new partner. That's not a perfect clean bill of health as you still can't be sure of how many partners they've had or how safe the sex they've been having is since their last test. It is much better than not having it in-hand.

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