Break Up Boot Camp

By

Break Up Boot Camp
Getting through a break up can be incredibly difficult. It is also a learning opportunity...

The third essential step is to accept that the relationship is over. This is no easy feat. Sometimes it helps to take significant, ceremonial steps to promise yourself that you will continue to accept that the relationship is over. Send your ex whatever things they have left at your place. (Don't make a plan for your ex to pick up their stuff, just throw it in a garbage bag and drop it off!) If you haven't already done so, defriend them on Facebook, stop following them on Twitter and, by all means, delete them from your phone! These steps can move you dramatically closer to acceptance, as they reduce your ability to waste emotional energy fantasizing about someone who is no longer available to you and therefore not a suitable parter.

If these steps do not get you over the hump, consider some form of group therapy. Break-Up Boot Camps and other forms of group therapy are extremely effective, as the absurdity of hanging onto an unavailable or otherwise unsuitable ex is incredibly obvious when you witness it in others. Participants can clearly observe the futility in another's efforts to hang on; such observation opens the door for them to gain dramatic perspective on their own wasted energy.

 

Don't give someone else the power to compromise your happiness; force yourself to take the triple A steps and you will be in a better position to get over your break up and, eventually, have healthier relationships.

To learn more about how to get over a difficult break up, click here.  Follow Elisabeth @elisjoy

This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission.
Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Elisabeth LaMotte

Counselor/Therapist

Social worker, psychotherapist, blogger and author of "Overcoming Your Parents' Divorce"

Location: Washington, DC
Credentials: LICSW, MFT, MSW
Specialties: Communication Problems, Dating/Being Single Support, Divorce/Divorce Prevention
Other Articles/News by Elisabeth LaMotte:

4 Struggles All Sex Addicts Face

By

Romantic relationships are complicated, intense, beautiful entities that can be challenging to nurture and sustain. Today's persistent emphasis on high-speed solutions, high-tech communications and ubiquitous social networking can compromise the development of a simple, organic union between two like-minded people hoping to find love. For those who struggle ... Read more

What Happens if Your Spouse Wants to Cheat?

By

Can a marriage be saved after infidelity? Is it okay to cheat if a marriage has become sexless? If infidelity is discovered and a couple wants to stay together, how do they find their way through? These questions are raised frequently during couples therapy if one or both partners have strayed. Ian McEwan's 2014 novel, The Children Act, offers a ... Read more

A Therapist's Review Of 'Romantics Anonymous'

By

Most of us experience some form of social anxiety. We may feel nervous before a social gathering or slightly agitated during group activities. In the extreme, social anxiety compromises the ability to connect to another person in an intimate relationship. Jean-Pierre Ameris' 2010 French film, Les Emotifs Anonymous, is a comedic but meaningful study of what ... Read more

See More

 
My Videos
ASK YOURTANGO MORE QUESTIONS
Must-see Videos
SEE MORE VIDEOS
Most Popular