Talk to Me! 7 Tips to Get Your Spouse to Open Up


Talk to Me! 7 Tips to Get Your Spouse to Open Up

4. Establish Expectations

Once you’ve gotten your own mind set in the right place, it’s vital that you let your spouse know in clear terms what you need from them.  Find some quiet time, turn off the television and tell your spouse that you really need to talk.  Sit down face-to-face, take their hands in yours, look them in the eye and really impress upon them how very important this is to you.


Don’t assume that your husband (or wife) really understands how deeply concerned you are about their lack of communication.  Tell them.

5. Don’t Expect a Mind Reader

After you’ve been married for a while, it is so easy to fall into patterns.  This is especially true in the area of communication where you develop expectations that your spouse knows what you are thinking and how you’d like them to interact with you. 

Take a few minutes to read “Attention Ladies: Your Husband Cannot Read Your Mind!” and take this message to heart.  With guys in particular, you cannot assume that we know what you want…trust me. 

6. Set Aside the Time to Talk

If you want to have a healthy marriage with extraordinary communication, you have to make it a priority.  This requires time, although it isn’t as difficult as it may sound. 

To get your relationship jump-started in 15 minutes a day, go grab the free report I put together for busy young couples called Marriage Mojo: 7 Simple Steps to Romance for Insanely Busy Couples.

Start setting aside a little time each day for the two of you to simply interact…without all of the distractions we all face in our busy family lives.

7. Affirm, Affirm, Affirm

Make it a point to let your spouse know about the things they do that you like!  There is no better way to encourage the behaviors you enjoy than by using positive reinforcement.

Try to make it a point to tell each other one little thing each day that you liked.  This could be as simple as saying thank you for an encouraging text message or sharing how cool you thought it was that they spent time playing with the kids outside while you prepared dinner in a quiet kitchen.  A little affirmation goes a long way!


*Give It a Shot*

If you take these tips to heart and implement them with passion, I am confident that you can make great strides in your marital communication

If you feel like your spouse needs a kick in the pants, I’d encourage you to take the first step and try engaging them by taking these actions for a week.  You'll be well on your way toward a more fulfilling, and conversational, marriage!

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