It’s no secret that good sex can lead to a happier marriage, and a recent study has pinpointed the one where most couples want to see an improvement.
Condom company Durex® polled 1,000 adults, married and single, and asked them intimate questions about their level of satisfaction with their sex lives, and the primary complaint they saw was the lack of duration in their sexual encounters.
More from YourTango: The Nature Of Polyamory: Is It Right For You?
A whopping full 50 percent of people said they weren’t happy with the duration (or lack thereof) they are experiencing in their sex lives. The average amount of time people reported for their average sexual encounter was 10 minutes, leading 38 percent of respondents to say that their lovemaking is over too fast. About 20 percent said they like their sexual encounters to last for at least half an hour.
Ironically, however, about 25 percent said they actually prefer the 10 minute “quickee” to longer sessions. The study did not indicate why, but the conventional wisdom we have derived from our practice with our patients over the years is that life has become vastly more complicated. Many couples have three or four jobs between them just to make ends meet. Between the obligations of work, children and family, sometimes even having 10 minutes for a little fun can be a luxury.
A few more interesting tid-bits revealed by the study include:
- Nearly 50 percent of all adults do not regularly achieve orgasm at the same time. In fact, more than a third of those surveyed said that it hardly ever — or never — happens.
- More than three-fourths of respondents said they’ve made love in an “adventurous locale.” Among the favorite places cited in the study: The backseat of a car (though we suspect the family van may become a true multi-purpose vehicle at times), by the swimming pool (we’re assuming they don’t mean the lap pool down at the YMCA) and on a secluded beach.
- But some prefer to stay at home. When they get tired of the bedroom, they send the kids out to the movies and take advantage of the air-conditioned square-footage in their homes. The favorite spots? The shower (31 percent), the couch (23 percent) and the porch (22 percent).
Women were asked what their fantasy locale for sex would be, and the top two answers were the Eiffel Tower and Buckingham Palace…. okay, we could fill an entire blog with wisecracks on that one, so we’re just going to leave that one alone — except to say it makes us wonder if any enterprising guests of the Queen’s recent Diamond Jubilee took advantage of their backstage passes.
At the end of the day, the study’s final word of advice was something we espouse daily to our clients. If couples want to derive more satisfaction out of their sex lives, they need to talk. Discuss your needs, your wants, your fantasies and your schedules so you can not only have great sex together, but also have the proper time to spend doing it, as well.
More from YourTango: Not Happy With Your Relationship?
Yours in good stamina,
Drs. Chuck and Jo-Ann Bird