Founder of Eros Coaching, Dr. Martha Tara Lee is a Clinical Sexologist who conducts sexuality and intimacy coaching in Asia. She is compassionate, practical, honest, interactive and solution-focused. Dr. Lee incorporates a blend of conventional and alternative approaches and draws upon a variety of styles and techniques to support each client as they work to resolve both current problems and long-standing patterns.
Dr. Lee utilizes her years of experience in professional communications and volunteer counseling to optimize her coaching work. A well-traveled Singaporean Chinese, Martha welcomes individuals as well as couples of all sexual orientations.
Often cited in the local media, Dr. Lee is the appointed sex expert for Men’s Health Singapore, Men’s Health Malaysia, Durex Singapore Facebook page as well as Durex Malaysia Facebook page. She has a weekly column with PublicHouse.sg and blogs for Good Vibrations Magazine. She was recognised as one of ‘Top 50 Inspiring Women under 40′ by Her World in July 2010, and one of ‘Top 100 Inspiring Women’ by CozyCot in March 2011. Her first book Love, Sex and Everything In-Between was published by Marshall Cavendish in Oct 2013.
Sexuality coaching is concerned with the physical, psychological, social, emotional, and spiritual makeup of an individual. It can address gender, gender role, gender identity, sexual orientation, sexual preference, and social norms as they affect physical, emotional, and spiritual life.
Life Coaching is about breaking down the barriers, which prevent change from happening and creating the ideal environment for positive action to take place. It is a totally holistic approach which looks at the present and sets goals for a more successful future.
Sexual Education Workshops
Dynamic and customized public education workshops and programs for educational institution and organizations are available. Please contact me directly to discuss your needs.
For greater convenience, telephone coaching or counseling is available through Skype. This option is extended to clients whom I have already met at least once. If you travel or other schedule demands make this the preferred option, please email to arrange.
Answer Sexuality Questions Via Email
Ask a factual question related to sex or sexuality and I will answer you within 72 hours! Note: This has to be a straight forward question where a clear answer is possible, and not applicable to personal sexual issues as it is not possible to diagnose or treat via email. Payment via Paypal.
The Reason I Became A Helping Professional
Personally, I was curious to learn more about sex because I did not receive any sexuality education growing up in Singapore. I missed out on biology completely because I was in the Arts stream. The compulsory annual school assemblies I attended through my secondary school career were on why women bled monthly and how we young ladies have to pay particular attention to personal hygiene.
I saw that there was a sore lack of trained sexuality educators in Singapore. Surely, there was more to understanding sex and sexuality than learning to protect against sexually transmitted infections (STIs), making babies and getting your period? This was why I decided to pursue a Doctorate in Human Sexuality and am now a trained Clinical Sexologist.
The best thing about my job is seeing the glimmer of hope on the faces of clients, reigniting the sparkle of light in their eyes and of course, helping them overcome their sexual difficulties and, consequently, achieve a more fulfilling life.”
A slightly longer, more honest answer is: I had to.
I was tired of the lack of any real and meaningful conversations about sex and sexuality. If sex was this wonderful, beautiful and intimate act between two people in love, why is it always talked about so negatively? Nobody was acknowledging the importance of sex and sexuality to one’s sense of well-being, not to mention the role it plays in a relationship.
Prior to this, I had already worked in corporate communications for eight years – doing public relations, marketing and advertising. I left a comfortable career to start a non-profit helping young people in the area of career guidance. I did so because I was no longer satisfied with the status quo. I could no longer deny that I care about people more than money, and helping people was more important to me than climbing the corporate ladder. I broke out of my comfort zone and there was no turning back. And yes, it was scary.
After two years doing a combination of volunteer recruitment and management, fundraising and everything in between, I realised my heart was with working with people directly. To ‘help’ from a distance was safe for me and I knew it. I had to put myself on the line.
I had been doing volunteer counselling work for three years by then, and realised that there was a jarring gap in the dialogues revolving around sexuality in Singapore. I knew as a professional sexologist, I would have the unique expertise that would allow me to contribute to the well-being of men and women – including helping them develop an understanding of their sexuality and better express themselves through sex and intimacy.
I also knew in my heart of hearts that I could make a difference, but I had to get the training. And I did.
Sex is not everything. But sex is important.
I became a Clinical Sexologist because I had to.
“I’ve been married for 10 years and never really had sex due to the pain I experience. I’ve been suffering in silence all these years as I do not know where to seek help. I went to a doctor in a local hospital a few years ago but that didn’t help at all. All the doctor advised was for me to try to relax and do the kegel exercises… sex was still a pain.
I went to see Martha in Jan this year. I wasn’t sure initially if she could really help me. But I thought, I have to give it a try. Throughout the whole session she made me feel very comfortable and at ease. And I still wasn’t sure if I could have sex successfully after the sessions with her. Not that I was not confident with her or doubt her abilities…I wasn’t sure if I could do it. But she gave me lots of encouragement and assured me that I could do it just like any other women. I listened attentively in the 2 sessions I had with her and did the exercises she told me to. After just 2 sessions, I did it! I had sex for the first time! It was an emotional and beautiful experience. It was painful and uncomfortable initially but as we move along, it became easier and more pleasurable. Now, I look forward to sex… I don’t have to turn away from sex due to pain anymore.
I thank Martha from the bottom of my heart. With her help I became a real women… she changed our lives… she strengthen my relationship with my husband.”
“When I first met Martha, I knew she would be someone I could talk to openly without having to censor myself or worry about being judged. She herself is a woman who can speak to people on many different levels, as I’ve observed, while always remaining true to who she is. She is open and candid, funny and smart, sensitive and compassionate. All these things made me comfortable in approaching her in the first place.
I had been suffering in silence for years and after meeting Martha, felt for the first time in my 28 years, like there was light at the end of the tunnel. Not only did she address all the issues I presented her with, she was 100 percent successful in helping me get over them!
I was a virgin for 28 years, not because I wanted to be or thought I had to save myself, but because sex was always something that was too painful for me. I had tried a number of times with a few partners, and attempted penetration always left me with blinding pain. I often felt like there was something wrong with me because I knew that sex was supposed to be a natural thing, and being single and having to date always made me feel anxious because I hated the thought of having to deal with sex with new people.
In only 3 sessions, Martha helped me overcome everything I had been trying to fight against all my life and I finally managed to have sex with the partner that I love and trust, whom I had been trying to make love to for 5 years. She went through relaxation exercises, physical exercises, pelvic exercises, and most of all, encouraged me. With every session, she gave me the courage to be myself and acknowledge the things I deserve.
By my fourth session with Martha, we were discussing methods to start enjoying the sex I was already having. If that’s not a feat, I don’t know what is.
She helped me with something that I was nearly going to give up on after having tried for so long.
Until I met Martha, I was clueless about the fact that there were practicing sexologists in Singapore and always felt at a loss when it came to whom I could talk to about my sexuality and my problems with sex. Martha gave me the avenue to be honest about sex in a society that is so afraid to even utter a word about it. If I had not met with her, I am certain that I would still be in the same position I was in a few months ago, struggling with something that I thought was near impossible.
I thank Martha from the bottom of my heart, for giving me the self-esteem to be a healthy, sexual person and for being the force that managed to push me over one of the greatest hurdles of my life.”
“I’ve been working on self-development for several years now, but I’ve found there’s little substitute for working with a coach to work through my issues. Martha is a personal coach who’s remarkably free from judgment. Her gentle challenges of “Well, why not?” to my countless self-imposed barriers, has removed more psychological roadblocks than I had ever managed on my own. I learned there’s as many solutions to life’s challenges as I’m open to.
Martha’s belief in the positive power of intimacy and an open heart pointed the way towards possibilities and experiences I never considered possible in my life. If you’ve an issue you haven’t been able to work out on your own, why not do something different this time? Try talking to Martha.”
- Anonymous Male
These sessions have covered three subjects which are current concerns for me:
1. developing a short term plan for improvement of physical exercise program and mental well being
2. initiation of a medium term career transition plan
3. defining first steps and aspirational goals for a long term personal development plan (a passion for more serious creative photography)
In each session, Ms. Lee expertly guided me through establishing the objective of the particular session, defining the goals I would like to set for myself, examination of options, hurdles, and opportunities in achieving these goals, and establishing my personal level of commitment to successful realization of these goals.
I would characterize Ms. Lee’s approach as professional, non judgemental, appropriately structured and goal oriented, personally interested and asking relevant thought provoking questions, encouraging of further ideas and development of detail action steps, and establishing a supportive openness to discuss follow through and results.
While these sessions were the first time I actually thought through and discussed many of my desired goals with another person, Ms Lee’s encouraging smile would appear at exactly the right instant to allow me to comfortably do so.
I value my coaching sessions with Ms. Lee, and feel I have already benefited greatly. She has my whole hearted recommendation.”
- Duff Hughes (Mr.)
|Main Specialty||Empowering Women|
|Time in Practice||3-5 years|
|I practice in||All areas, please inquire|
|Additional Expertise||Life Coach|
|I offer my services||At my office|
Via a webcam
Other, please inquire
|I am fluent in||Chinese|
• What are the sexual problems faced by most Asian women? • How ...