Motivation and How to Create It (Good Boss/Bad Boss)

By

Motivation and How to Create It (Good Boss/Bad Boss)
Dr. Romance helps you to realize the way towards your goals with positive motivation vs. negative.

If you find yourself around someone who takes command and tells you what you should be doing, or comments unasked about how you are doing things wrong, or otherwise appoints him/herself as the boss in your life, you may find your newly-created motivation flagging. Remember to fire them as your boss. It’s YOUR life, and you are doing whatever you are doing because you WANT to. You need to give no better reason to anyone but yourself.

Once you have fired this self-appointed boss, then you may need to remind yourself of how much you have accomplished without that kind of help. Celebrate your independence, your spirit, your willingness to be responsible for yourself.

It is also possible to set up informative books, articles, television authorities, gurus, etc. up as your boss—in which case, you will again find your motivation flagging. These informational aids can be useful, but only if your keep them in perspective.

Remember, the boss gets information about how to run things, gets educated, goes for help when necessary, BUT the boss is still in charge. The information is there for your use, but no expert, (no, not even a therapist) can know if the information is right for you.

If you remember who the boss is, then you will use the information wisely and judiciously, rejecting whatever there is that does not suit your style or personality. You will use it to support and further your goals, and to aid in the celebration of your accomplishments.

Whenever you find your motivation flagging, look around for how you are doing at being your boss. Are you using a motivational, supportive style? Have you let someone else take over your authority? Is there some appreciation you need?

Take a few minutes with yourself every day just for appreciation. It’s easy, fun, and very effective. Imagine living every day energized and motivated!!
 

This article was originally published at Tina B. Tessina. Reprinted with permission.
Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Dr. Tina Tessina

Author

Tina B. Tessina, Ph.D.
http://www.tinatessina.com
tina@tinatessina.com
562-438-8077
Dr. Romance Blog: http://drromance.typepad.com/dr_romance_blog/
http://www.twitter.com/tinatessina
http://www.facebook.com/#!/DrRomanceBlog
Amazon author page http://amzn.to/rar7RC
 

Location: Long Beach, CA
Credentials: LMFT, MFT, PhD
Other Articles/News by Dr. Tina Tessina:

Dear Dr. Romance: If I am not strong, I cannot be an example for

By

Dear Dr. Romance: I am mid-thirties mom with 3 children looking to divorce. I read your article "Family Violence Q & A" and I decided to write to you for help to stand on my feet again.  I was a homemaker since I had my first child, but had lived very unfulfilled as my husband (who was my first and only boyfriend) emotionally and verbally ... Read more

Dr. Romance's Guidelines for Not Fighting

By

Fighting a lot? Dr. Romance recommends: No matter what you’re fighting about: money, sex, kids or something else, the fighting is an indication that your communication isn’t working. If this happens only occasionally, such as when one or both of you are tired or stressed; it’s not too big a problem. However, if you argue or bicker on a ... Read more

These Decisions Can Increase Your Happiness

By

When you use smart decisions and self-awareness to shape your life, it will reflect your deepest aspirations and your fondest dreams. Make your life your own. Decide to re-decide. Re-examine your goals and dreams. Don't just assume that what you wanted yesterday is still right for you. Have your goals and dreams changed? Give yourself the freedom to ... Read more

See More

PARTNER POSTS
Latest Expert Videos
Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

Most Popular