Motivation and How to Create It (Good Boss/Bad Boss)

By

Motivation and How to Create It (Good Boss/Bad Boss)
Dr. Romance helps you to realize the way towards your goals with positive motivation vs. negative.

The Good Boss
–Praises Frequently
–Always lets you know when you’re doing well
–Asks you what you need whenever you’ve made a mistake;
–Is very helpful
–Is concerned about your well-being as well as your productivity
–Assumes you want to do a good job
–Helps you feel like part of the team
–Treats you as a valued human being
–Is clear about the duties expected of you.

Both of these bosses have the same goal: to get the job done. However, there is a big difference in the success of their individual management styles. Think about your probable reaction to the two styles of management. The bad boss’s office is characterized by tension and anger. People work only to keep the boss off their backs, and consequently goof-off whenever he/she is not around. They are not efficient, because they are not motivated to accomplish anything, merely to avoid the boss’s anger. They are operating in a mental state we call “adaptation”, which is focused on keeping someone (usually someone angry or nasty) off their backs.

They have little loyalty to anything but their paychecks, and perhaps each other, as mistreated prisoners are loyal to each other when confronting the jailer. Offices which are characterized by inefficiency and disharmony. If this boss requires overtime, he/she encounters resistance.

If you were working for this boss, how would you feel? Would you go to work happily each day? Would you volunteer for extra work? Would you look forward to each new assignment? Probably not. In short, you would not feel highly motivated, would you?

On the other hand, the employees of the good boss tend to care about themselves and their jobs. They feel proud of their accomplishments, and eager to learn more and accomplish more. If the boss is gone, the work still goes on, because people are in a mental state of motivation, and are being gratified by their sense of accomplishment. When this boss requests overtime, he/she will be met with a cooperative response.

Again, take a moment and picture yourself in this situation. How would you feel? Would you feel eager to please this boss? Would you look forward to his/her reaction to your latest work? Would you be willing to help out, if extra work were necessary? Most likely, you would—you would feel enthusiastic and motivated, looking forward to work each day.

Notice the difference in your energy in the two situations. Which boss would you rather work for? Hopefully, it’s as obvious to you as it is to me. I would prefer the good boss (just the names I have chosen for the two styles have probably made that obvious.)

In the daily tasks and situations of our lives, we become our own bosses; whether we are aware of it or not. We have a choice about which kind of a boss we wish to be to ourselves. If you decide as most of my clients (and myself) have, you will choose to become the good boss to yourself. This means you learn to treat yourself with kindness and understanding, be very generous with praise, and gentle with corrections. Then you will accomplish your goals with a sense of pride and achievement, and a great deal of pleasure. You will feel motivated, and wonder why you never realized how easy it was.

This article was originally published at Tina B. Tessina. Reprinted with permission.
Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Dr. Tina Tessina

Author

Tina B. Tessina, Ph.D.
http://www.tinatessina.com
tina@tinatessina.com
562-438-8077
Dr. Romance Blog: http://drromance.typepad.com/dr_romance_blog/
http://www.twitter.com/tinatessina
http://www.facebook.com/#!/DrRomanceBlog
Amazon author page http://amzn.to/rar7RC
 

Location: Long Beach, CA
Credentials: LMFT, MFT, PhD
Other Articles/News by Dr. Tina Tessina:

Dr. Romance Video: How to Decide Whether or Not to End Your Marri

By

To view the video, click here. Dr Romance: Should you stay in your marriage? Marriage can be frustrating and disappointing, especially if you don't have the skills to fix it.  But giving in to the frustration and leaving may turn out to be the worst thing you ever did. Consider these reasons to stay: 1. You still love each other. Maybe ... Read more

Romance is Not Necessarily Love

By

In romantic depictions of love, cute little images of cherubs and cupids abound. But Cupid, in his real incarnation, is not so sweet and cuddly. His arrows can create deep and lasting wounds, and can strike you blind and irrational in a heartbeat. A few disaster-filled run-ins with Cupid’s dart and you can readily believe that love will never work for ... Read more

Mirrors and Teachers

By

There are people I love who are easy to be around, and others I love who are more difficult for me. It’s not that they’re bad people, others get along with them fine, and, actually, so do I. It’s just that I have to work a little bit more to understand what they mean, to not take what they say the wrong way, or use a little more patience ... Read more

See More

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.